IBM Finds Case Of Beer. G5 Further Constrained.


Disappointed Mac users learned today that availability of G5 chips has been further constrained after IBM found a case of beer.

“It was out back on the loading dock, an already inebriated IBM slurred. “Didn’t have nobody’s name on it…”

This development is expected to delay both September’s introduction of the G5 iMac as well as any chances of seeing 3 GHz Power Macs any time soon.

Asked when the company might have a chance to get back to making more processors, the company said “Shut up! Man, why you always got to be such a downer? Can’t you see I’m partyin’?

“What happened to you, man? What… what… what…

“Uh… what… what time is it?” IBM asked through half-closed eyelids.

According to sources in Fishkill, New York, the site of IBM’s G5 processor plant, the company discovered a case of Genesee Cream Ale on the loading dock around 11 PM this morning and was about two-thirds of the way through it by the end of lunch.

“You know… you know…” IBM said, waving a green can in the air. “I’ve got half a mind to tell that Steve Jobs to go stick it! Who does he think he is, anyway?!”

IBM said nothing for a few moments and idly sipped out of the can.

“You know who’s a great guy?” the company suddenly asked. “Steve Jobs! He’s a good friend of mine, you know that?”

Sources were uncertain how long the company would stay all liquored up.