Spooky Apple Rumors Site.

In honor of Halloween, Crazy Apple Rumors Site presents the following list of Apple terrors. This list is not for those under 17, pregnant women or elderly gentlemen with weak tickers.

  1. The iPod battery… THAT WOULDN’T DIE! (AAAAAIIIEEEEE!)
  2. The switcher… WHO JUST BITCHES AND BITCHES AND BITCHES ABOUT HOW MUCH BETTER IT WAS ON WINDOWS BUT WON’T SWITCH BACK! (NOOOOOOOOOO!)
  3. The MacBook Pro… THAT BURNS THE LOINS! (ARRRRRRRRGGGG!)
  4. The Microsoft-friendly blogger… WHO KNOWS WHAT APPLE MUST DO TO SURVIVE! (OH, NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!)
  5. Dinner with… GEORGE OU! (BLEAAAAARRRRRRGGG!)
  6. Three hours on a Sunday afternoon watching… A PRESENTATION AT YOUR LOCAL MUG ENTITLED “GETTING THE MOST OUT OF OS 9”! (WHY DON’T YOU FUCKING UPGRADE?!)
  7. Steve Jobs… QUITS TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH HIS FAMILY! (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!)

[shudder]

I don’t know about you, but I’m not sleeping tonight.

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