iWork Killer App For Tablet?

Astounding news is rocking the tablet rumor circuit as Apple appears prepared to deliver a tablet-enabled version of iWork when it introduces its new tablet at the tablet special event on January 27th, also known as “Tablet launch day”. (Tablet.)

Needless to say, Apple fans are beside themselves as the thought of rocking spreadsheets through an as yet-to-be-determined input mechanism has them literally salivating.

“I am so fucking psyched,” said Mac user Jim Ray, wiping his chin. “Spreadsheets fucking rule. And I have to imagine that spreadsheets on a tablet ultra-mega-rule, what with the smaller screen size. Just think, we’ll be able to do spreadsheets or write business letters or create presentations – but mostly do spreadsheets – in the bathroom!

“I mean, I do that already, but now I’m gonna do it on a tablet! Wow!”

While the excitement generated by the killer combination of spreadsheets and tablets is palpable, some questions remain.

“I can’t believe that in just a few weeks I’m going to be typing into a spreadsheet on the tablet’s virtual keyboard!” said Macworld’s Dan Moren. “Or, possibly, writing etext with a stylus on a spreadsheet! That always works so awesome. Or, maybe, talking into the tablet and having my numbers flawlessly be translated into the spreadsheet through some kind of ‘computer magic’. One thing we know for sure is that it won’t be via a physical keyboard because this is a tablet and that would just be lame.

“But, hell, I don’t care how it happens! All I care about is spreadsheets on tablets! Yeah!”

Analysts were at a loss to explain why the potential for iWork on a tablet has everyone so worked up. Some pointed to recent controversial scientific studies that showed brain damage in rats after prolonged exposure to aluminum.

28 thoughts on “iWork Killer App For Tablet?”

  1. Number nine, number nine, number nine, number nine…

    That’s the only number I could get to work on the iTablet’s Numbers spreadsheet.

  2. See? He just needed something interesting to post about. If Apple keeps delivering, he’ll keep posting.

  3. I, for one, am disappointed by this.

    I figured that iWork for the Tablet would actually go out and kill people. I guess we’ll have to leave that to Del’s critters.

  4. Sweet sixteen!

    I for one cannot wait for something else to spread the sheets… it’s so hard to get the bed made just right with wrinkles.

  5. *facepalm*
    I would like to announce, that iMoo’s comments are unnaturally funny due to a (legally)drug induced stupor. My Pantsâ„¢ and I feel this is an unfair advantage. Although iMoo has promised my Pantsâ„¢ a [drug] supply of their own, we must stand by our principles and denounce this unnatural funniness.

  6. Larry beat me to it. The first sexbot arrives on the scene and nothing. Unless John was one of the first customers and he’s reaaaaal busy… Wonder what the wife thinks of that…

  7. I would like to see this theme developed a bit more. How about the nifty books full of spreadsheets and charts that you could publish from your iBook/Tablet/Slate using Pages? Or the exciting presentations of spreadsheet data that could be made via the mobile Keynote component of the app? I’m so thrilled by the potential that I’m almost awake.

  8. The inscription on the back of John Moltz’s tablet will read “PROPERTY OF JOHN GRUBER.” John Moltz is John Gruber.

  9. You utter bastards.

    I nip off to paint my house, only to come back and find everyone’s posted all over the shop, thereby leapfrogging past me into the petting-lap of Moltz.

    Not I nice image, certainly, but one that doubtless accurately conveys our bestial purry-contentedness at a fresh post. The presence of which I attribute almost entirely to our taking the piss out of John and/or general goading.

    In which context I’m now going to call him a lazy git, which will hopefully produce another post tomorrow.

    What could possibly go wrong?

  10. Ya know, I think I finally connected the spots before my eyes and I do believe Jack Miller is the Macalope! ok,OK, so it took me four years but still….

  11. zacksback: Sorry, but nobody gives a crap about the unfunny Macalope. Unless of course one of Del’s critters get ahold of it… Well, then all bets are off.

    Brother: Please tell me that I misread your post and that you did not ask that question at the end. You’ve been around here long enough to know that no good can come from it.

  12. I’m hoping the new decade will be a fresh start for things Not Possibly Going Wrong on CARS.

    After all, you can only have one Cyber Apocalypse per century, surely?

    And

  13. What the cuss is with the cussing language in your cussing post, Moltz? If I wanted to read some cussing bad language I would be reading John Gruber’s cussing posts!

    Oh, wait…

  14. Tablet easter egg: if you fling it like a frisbee, it deploys wings and a concealed engine, and flies to its charging station.

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