20 Jan 04Rubinstein Tired Of Renting.


According to sources within Apple’s hardware engineering division, Vice President Jon Rubinstein has decided he has finally had enough of renting and will seek to buy a modest starter home.

“I just said to myself, that’s it. No more throwin’ good money after bad,” Rubinstein said.

A first-time home buyer, Rubinstein will qualify for a discounted mortgage rate.

“I don’t have a lot of money to put down,” Rubinstein admitted. “I’m finally gonna have to sell the Charger, which means no more late-night cruisin’ up and down de Anza Boulevard. Those were good times. Me, Vinny and the Spaz just looking for fun.”

Rubinstein looked whistfully out the window of his One Infinite Loop office at de Anza Boulevard for a moment before collecting himself.

“But, if my parents’ll kick in a little, I think I can get about five grand together and… I don’t know… maybe get a little rambler… Or I may look into today’s manufactured homes. I understand they’re making them a lot better now.”

Rubinstein currently lives in a one-bedroom apartment in the Cedar Crest complex. His apartment has no washer and dryer, which is his major complaint about his current living situation.

“It’s $500 a month which isn’t bad,” the Apple executive explained, “But, man, I’m sick of going to the laundromat every week.

“That and I can hear everything going on in the apartment next door. And I mean everything.”

Rubinstein hopes that when he does buy his new home, the other Apple executives will help him move.

“I don’t have a lot of furniture,” Rubinstein was reportedly heard saying to Vice President of Retail Ron Johnson. “And once I drain the water bed, it’s really pretty light. And then there’s just my comic books… and the beer can collection…”

Rubinstein expects to get qualified for a loan this week and hopes to begin looking at homes over the weekend.

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