I’ve just got a quick minute between forays to let you all know how it’s going.
Our attack against Tentaculous totally took him by surprise! The Entity’s elite force of other entities were all like “HIIIIIII-YAAAAAWWW!” And the lesbian ninjas on loan from Apple were all like “HI-YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI-YAI!”
Tentaculous, as ever, has been ruthless in his counteroffensive, but always a gracious host. Our encampment overlooking the field of battle is very well appointed. The caterer has been excellent and later I’m getting a foot massage. When this is all over, I must ask him for the recipe for those little puff pastries with the spinach and goat cheese.
Man, I am going to need to go on a diet after this trans-galactic attack!
As for Macworld rumors, well, you’ve all no doubt heard the rumors of a cheap Mac and an Apple Works replacement on the way. Then there’s the flash-based iPod that we’ve all known about for a long time and a Firewire music media device. Also expected to be announced are speed-bumped PowerBooks and iBooks and a wireless media center for your living room.
That’s a lot for one keynote, but it’s not all. Crazy Apple Rumors Site sources indicate that Steve Jobs will also announce he’s got a thing for Swedish nurses (no surprise there, really) shortly before performing the “lady in a box” trick on Senior Vice President of the iPod Division Jon Rubinstein.
Remember, these are reliable sources.
Anyway, we should be able to provide some coverage of the event.
Unless it’s during one of our scheduled outings to the local hot spring or the galactic pie factory.