Exclusive Phil Schiller Interview!

Crazy Apple Rumors Site had the chance to sit down with Apple senior vice president of worldwide marketing Phil Schiller and discuss the announcements at this year’s Macworld Expo keynote. Here’s the transcript.

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MOLTZ: Phil, thanks for taking the time to sit down with us. I’m sure you’re busy.

SCHILLER: Um, no, actually. Pretty quiet.

MOLTZ: Uh… oh. That’s… odd.

SCHILLER: Yeah. You’re right! That is odd!

MOLTZ: …

SCHILLER: [SUDDENLY LOOKING OVER FIRST ONE SHOULDER AND THEN THE NEXT] I think I may have lost my assistant.

MOLTZ: You should look into that.

SCHILLER: I should look into that!

MOLTZ: OK, but after the interview.

SCHILLER: OK. Fair enough. You did buy the Junior Mints.

MOLTZ: I actually bought those for myself, but… Well, it’s fine. So, Phil, let’s talk about the MacBook Air.

SCHILLER: John, this is a product we’re really excited about. We think this is a great laptop for people on the go.

MOLTZ: It sure looks like it, Phil. You know, looking at it, it looks a lot like the new iPod nano, how it’s super thin and has very tapered edges. It’s clear where the inspiration was.

SCHILLER: What? It doesn’t look anything like the nano.

MOLTZ: Well, uh, it does a little. I mean, c’mon.

SCHILLER: No. No, no, no. It’s totally different. That’s an iPod! This is a MacBook!

MOLTZ: Oh. Well… OK. Let’s talk about something else. Movie rentals.

SCHILLER: Yes! We’ve got all 11 studios and we’ll be launching with a 1,000 titles. Did you know we have every Charles Grodin movie?

MOLTZ: Uh, no. Is that, uh, good?

SCHILLER: Are you kidding? Charles Grodin?! The man is a comedic genius!

MOLTZ: Wasn’t he in those Beethoven movies?

SCHILLER: What?

MOLTZ: The ones with the St. Bernard. The kids movies.

SCHILLER: Maybe I’m thinking of Seth Rogen.

MOLTZ: Maybe you’re thinking of Beth Hogan.

SCHILLER: Who’s Beth Hogan?

MOLTZ: Someone I went to high school with.

SCHILLER: I don’t think that’s likely.

MOLTZ: She was hot.

SCHILLER: OK, that makes it slightly more likely but still really, really unlikely.

MOLTZ: So, OK, you’ve got “Knocked Up” then.

SCHILLER: Well, that’s a rather personal question! I think this interview is over!

MOLTZ: It certainly is.

SCHILLER: I have to go find my assistant anyway.

MOLTZ: Phil, always a pleasure.

SCHILLER: No, no. The pressure is mine.

MOLTZ: Uh, what?

SCHILLER: Pleasure. I meant “pleasure”.

MOLTZ: Hmm.