09 Feb 11The Setup

I was asked by the fine folks at the Setup to detail my computer setup, how I “get the job done”.

THE SETUP: WHAT THE…? WAIT, THIS GUY WAS NOT ACTUALLY ASKED BY US TO DO THIS.

The Setup, as you know, “is a collection of nerdy interviews, asking people from all walks of life about the software and hardware they use.”

“People from all walks of life” is a coy way of saying “thought leaders”, people who are simply better, more accomplished than you are. Like me.

Let’s get into my Setup.

THE SETUP: WE HAVE NO IDEA WHO THIS GUY IS. NEVER HEARD OF HIM. WE DON’T EVEN KNOW HOW IT IS WE’RE WRITING ON THIS SITE. WE WERE OUT HAVING SOME DRINKS AND THEN WE BLACKED OUT AND NOW WE’RE HERE IN THIS STRANGELY TRON-LIKE WORLD.

Who are you and what do you do?

THE SETUP: HEY, STOP THAT!

I’m John Moltz and I’m one of a new breed of Internet creative content creators who create content on the Internet responding to memes, trending Twitter topics and Facebook with Web 3.0-based content on the Internet using HTML 5.0 standards-based Internet content-creation for mobile platform deployment of content, on the Internet, and Twitter.

THE SETUP: OH, COME ON. YOU’RE JUST THROWING OUT RANDOM BUZZWORDS.

Hey! I read what the other people on your site did! Don’t start changing the rules of the game now!

THE SETUP: FINE. LET’S JUST GET THROUGH THIS AS FAST AS POSSIBLE, OK? WHAT HARDWARE ARE YOU USING?

My main rig is a Huffy 3-speed with a banana seat, a sissy bar and tassles on the handles. I like to prop the end of a board up on a soap box and do some wicked jumps off…

THE SETUP: NO, NO, YOU IDIOT! YOUR COMPUTER HARDWARE!

Oh. Are you sure? I think I’m more known for my boss tricks.

THE SETUP: I AM GOING SOCK YOU RIGHT IN THE BANANA SEAT WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE.

Well, my laptop is a 13-inch 2.5 Ghz MacBook Pro. Lately, because I ride the train to my day job (long story involving the Entity and loss of funding), I’ve been working a lot on an iPad with Apple’s Bluetooth keyboard. I also have a 2.4 Ghz 20-inch iMac which is mainly a media server that has a FireWire 800 Drobo for backup. Then I have a 1.5 Ghz Mac mini I use for archiving older data and doing random tasks like long uploads. 

THE SETUP: AND WHAT SOFT…

My old 1 Ghz Titanium PowerBook…

THE SETUP: OH. SORRY. I ASSUMED YOU WERE DONE.

…sits on the desk next to the mini and I use it to copy old VHS tapes to digital using an EyeTV. I also have a G4 Sawtooth that I run headless for backup of files I really should just delete but don’t because I lack conviction.

THE SETUP: NOW CAN WE TALK ABOUT…

I also have…

THE SETUP: OH, JESUS.

…a Performa 6400 which sits in the corner and I use to access floppy disks when needed or to just play retro games like Marathon or SimAnt.

THE SETUP: …

And I have a Mac SE.

THE SETUP: …

And a Mac Plus.

THE SETUP: …

That’s it.

THE SETUP: WHAT THE HELL IS THE MATTER WITH YOU?

OK, ask me about software now.

THE SETUP: UGH. WHAT SOFTWARE DO YOU USE? ASSHOLE.

On the Mac I use BBEdit for writing my numerous, highly popular web sites…

THE SETUP: [EYE ROLL]

…and on the iPad I use PlainText which is a great iOS text editor that syncs with DropBox. For reading, I use NetNewsWire on both the Mac and iOS as well as the indispensable Instapaper which is great for sending articles to that you can later delete without reading. It’s one of a new breed of guilt-lessening apps that enable bad behaviors that you either can’t or don’t want to shake. I think they’re going to be the next big thing in software development.

THE SETUP: YOU’RE USING IT WRONG.

Ha-ha! Well, one of us is, that’s for sure!

THE SETUP: IT’S YOU.

Ha-ha! Ahhh. You’re probably right.

THE SETUP: CAN WE GO NOW?

It’s like you don’t even know your own shtick.

THE SETUP: OH FOR… WHAT WOULD BE YOUR DREAM SETUP?

Well, I think the main thing that’s holding back my game is…

THE SETUP: HAVING INHALED PLASTIC FUMES AS A CHILD?

Hey, no one told me that melted plastic – my medium of choice – was not a good idea. But, no, it’s not having a top-of-the-line MacBook Air.

THE SETUP: SO, YOU’D DITCH THE IPAD OR THE MACBOOK PRO?

Ditch? No, no. What, are you crazy? I need an Air in addition to those. I mean, if I really want to take it to the next level.

THE SETUP: TAKE WHAT TO THE NEXT LEVEL? WHAT DO YOU EVEN DO?

Look, I told you. I’m into creative Internet content creation. On the Internet. Oh, and I don’t have a Magic Trackpad. I’d like one of those.

THE SETUP: YOU JUST WANT NEW TOYS! YOU’RE NOT USING THEM TO DO ANYTHING! YOU’RE LIKE A TODDLER.

Ha! A toddler with 15 mildly amusing web sites!

THE SETUP: EXACTLY.

Oh. Right. That’s not actually better, is it.

THE SETUP: WE’RE DONE NOW, RIGHT? CAN WE GO?

Um… yeah. The door was actually open the whole time.

THE SETUP: I HATE YOU.

118 Responses to “The Setup”

  1. Ace Deuce says:

    101 Dalmations.

  2. Nxxx says:

    Ugh! That was almost as bad as Christchurch.

  3. The Highly Esteemed Yoyo says:

    I don’t even believe any of this actually happened.

  4. Steve G. says:

    BroMu,

    Watch out!!!
    He’s in the house!!

  5. Brother Mugga says:

    What, like Ali G?

  6. Steve G. says:

    No, that scary caller!

    Although having Ali G in your house would be scary.

  7. Brother Mugga says:

    What if Ali G *were* the scary caller?

    Innit?

  8. Steve G. says:

    My condolences to Ali G.
    I’m sure one of Del’s critters would have gotten to him.

  9. Nxxx says:

    Don’t upset the Staines Massive.

  10. Steve G. says:

    What will happen if I upset it/them?

  11. Nxxx says:

    It was Ali G’s original mob.

    Have heard of many lifeless things floating down the Thames from their hood.

    Mainly plastic, dead swans and fish.

  12. Huh? says:

    The dead swans were made of plastic?

  13. Steve G. says:

    Reminds me of those terrorist pandas in that book…

  14. Huh? says:

    The pandas were plastic, too?
    And if they were plastic, what are they now?

    Oh, and to all the peoples on the east side of the pond, I waved as I flew over this morning. Barcelona->JFK->LAX. Way too much time in the air, but some nice frequent flier miles.

  15. Sue says:

    I was waving back, Huh?. Did you see me?

  16. Nxxx says:

    Huh?,
    Sorry about the SAM, thought it was one of Del’s Giant CrayfishVultures.

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