Crazy Apple Rumors Site sources today indicate that Apple, despite the numerous patent claims and weeks of rock-solid reports of multiple iPhone models, only started working on the iPhone yesterday.
According to those in the know, the company had not even considered getting into the cellular phone business until it became apparent that rumors of an iPhone were not going away and that the company would be considered a failure if it didn’t produce.
“Well, we didn’t want to do one,” said Apple hardware engineer Alan Kane, “but now we kind of have to. Sheesh.
“Everyone’s all ‘Ooh, the iPhone’s got a slide-out keyboard and video and songs and it’s GSM and CDMR, M-O-U-S-E.’ And you know how Steve hates to let people down. Oh, he hates it.”
Apple is rushing to get the iPhone designed and prototyped before Macworld San Francisco next month so that it can be announced during the keynote.
Kane said it should be no problem.
“We’ll just cram. Pull a couple of nighters. We made the first iPod in a week and a half. I mean, it’s just a hard drive. And we didn’t even write the OS.
“If worse comes to worse, we’ll just mock something up with foam core board and some glue. A couple of pipe cleaners. That’s what we did with the iTV.”
Other than Kane and several senior executives and PR officials who provided background information, Apple declined to comment for this story.
The group specifically listed Shuffle and Repeat, which it said “clearly depict acts of intercourse.”