Analysts Downgraded Apple On Second Quarter Outlook.

Despite Apple’s exceptional first quarter results which the company announced yesterday, its stock was down over five points today as analysts took a skeptical outlook on the second quarter.

While analysts were mostly just dubious that Apple could continue to sell 500 million iPods a quarter, the fact that the company’s second quarter guidance included plans to spend spring break “going wild” in Ft. Lauderdale probably did not help.

“In a twelve week quarter, you can’t afford to lose one whole week getting plastered and having sex with strangers,” said Piper Jaffray’s Gene Munster.

“And it’s not just that week. It’s bound to affect Apple’s performance after that. You don’t wake up with your head on a beer-soaked night stand in a hotel you’re not registered in with your panties around your ankles and then immediately go back to hawking products.

“Well, unless you’re Paris Hilton! Ooh! Boo-yah!”

Apple, however, said that it had worked hard all semester and deserved to “blow off a little steam.”

“It’s not easy selling 900 million iPods,” the company said, “And if I want to reward myself by entering a wet t-shirt contest, making out with other hot chicks on camera and throwing up on in the back of a police van, that’s my decision!”

Several analysts downgraded Apple today from “outperform” to “slut.”