18 Mar 04From Bad to Worse

Oh, dear.

Oh, no.

This is…

This is no good.

You guuuuuuuys

See, Chet and Ugluk were fighting over who was going to pick today’s colors and then Howard said he wanted to pick the colors which is really stupid because dogs don’t even see in color and finally after all the yelling and screaming and shoving and slapping and biting and running around I screamed “WILL YOU PLEASE KNOCK IT OFF?! I JUST WANT PEACE IN THIS FAMILY! ST. PATRICK’S DAY WAS JUST YESTERDAY! HAVE YOU ALREADY LOST THE SPIRIT OF THAT HALLOWED HOLIDAY?! DO YOU THINK IRISH FAMILIES FIGHT LIKE THIS?!”

Which, admittedly, I blurted out without really thinking about.

And it probably didn’t do my naive reference to the Irish people any favors that we were still drunk at the time.

And that I was still wearing my green t-shirt that says “Shillelagh rides – $1.”

But anyway, I just told them I was sick of them squabbling like a bunch of high school Heathers over who gets to wear which chiffon dress to the prom and who gets to bang which strapping member of the varsity football team.

“Finish it,” I said. “Fin… ish… iiit.

And then I stormed off.

Now I log on to find that, as with what always happens when I don’t give them explicite instructions, they figured out the worst possible way to handle the situation. I think they each took a turn picking colors and that got us to…. this.

This whole thing is really starting to get to me. Because while we sit and argue over various shades of chartreuse, the other rumor sites are getting in on all the cool stuff we usually report on.

Like this.

And this.

And possibly this.

I just hope Masako can set this straight when she gets back.

I understand a lot of our readers are getting fired because their bosses are suddenly realizing what it is they’re reading all day. That can’t be good for site traffic.

No Responses to “From Bad to Worse”

  1. Del says:

    hmmmmm Shillelagh rides….

    I could definitly go for a few of those. Damn, I didn’t realize how much I missed out on this Saint Patty’s Day. I never got any Shillelagh Rides and I have $6.00!

    Oh what the color chagned.. Hadn’t noticed. I just keep thinking about Shillelagh rides 🙂

  2. jkojima says:

    Does anyone else actually really like the new scheme? Cuz I do!

    With the neon and the hey hey it takes me back to the early 90s with slap bracelets and shoe toggles.

    It may be a colourful bonanza, but it’s a well conceived colourful bonanza.

  3. Thuros M. says:

    These colors are making my testicles shrivel. I hate it when my testicles shrivel.

    I like blue. Blue makes me happy .. and it doesn’t make my testicles shrivel.

  4. fuddes says:

    This website is funny, but it never discusses the real issues facing our nation, like why my computer suddenly smells like farts.

  5. doggo says:

    Well, finally. Here’s to CARS for finally sorting out the color issue. I love, love, LOVE the new design and color scheme! Keep up the good work.

  6. Mr. Moist says:

    Thuros M.

    You just need a good Shillelagh ride. That will help those shrivelled testicles.

    Back off Del. I lined up with money first.

    Now… who’s Shillelagh do I get to ride first?

    The colors just seem to fit.

  7. Tim Knight says:

    hey, nobody told me this colour was scratch’n’sniff!!!

    *scratch, scratch*

    it smells like……



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