29 Mar 05Tevanian Won't Shut Up About Survivor/Tiger Relationship.


Reports from Apple today indicate that Chief Software Technology Officer Avie Tevanian’s insistence that ’80s rock band Survivor perform their hit song Eye of the Tiger at Mac OS X 10.4’s release party is starting to wear thin.

According to sources, Tevanian has consistently attempted to make his case that associating Eye of the Tiger with the release of the operating system code-named Tiger is a no-brainer. Sadly, many executives ironically agree with him.

“This was amusing about ten months ago,” said Senior Vice President of Software Engineering Bertrand Serlet. “Now? Not so much.”

Serlet said that Tevanian has attempted to convince his fellow executives, other Apple employees, members of the food service industry and anyone else who will listen that:

  • Associating Eye of the Tiger with Mac OS X 10.4 Tiger would be a marketing coup.
  • Tigers are fierce predators, much as Survivor rocked fiercely.
  • Survivor rules.

Tevanian usually ends his tirades by holding his index and pinky fingers up and sticking out his tongue and wiggling it.

Multiple emails Tevanian sent to Senior Vice President of Worldwide Marketing Phil Schiller pleading his case have been obtained by Crazy Apple Rumors Site and paint a picture of increasing desperation.

7/28/2004 – Hey, just following up on that hallway conversation we had. I wasn’t sure if I was completely clear because you kept laughing like I was joking. I really think a hit song like Eye of the Tiger would make Tiger’s release a mega-success. Mega. Just an idea.

9/21/2004 – Look, I know a guy who knows a guy who knows Jim Peterik. I could put you in touch with him. I just think we should investigate it. Let me know!

12/22/2004 – I hate to be a pest about this, but I just think it’d be totally boss to have them at the release party. Assuming we could even get them. They might be touring.

2/8/2005 – If Tiger’s release flops, don’t come crying to me. I did my part, man. That’s it. I wash my hands of it.

3/15/2005 – Just one more thing on Survivor. That wasn’t their only good song. “I Can’t Hold Back”? Everyone knows that one.

To date, Schiller has not returned Tevanian’s emails or voice-mails concerning the issue. Sources indicate that Tevanian’s single-minded persistence is a driving factor in getting Tiger out the door as soon as possible.

No Responses to “Tevanian Won't Shut Up About Survivor/Tiger Relationship.”

  1. K.S. 2.6.6 says:

    first post!

  2. Chuckles the clown says:

    Whoppee!

    Top five at least…

  3. K.S. 2.6.7 says:

    I’m gonna give this a shot

    Give it all I’ve got

    Trying to rhyme

    Like all the time

    But it’s my first try

    So don’t you cry

    I’ll get it down

    By the second round

    I’ll weave those words

    and tell thee with glee

    First post is mine

    whooooopeeee!

  4. Huck says:

    Very good gloating, K S. most people don’t know how to do it properly. Bravo!

  5. K.S. 2.6.8 says:

    thanks!

  6. Bellidancer says:

    Any one, ANY ONE! would be better than Madonna.

  7. Bellidancer says:

    Ok, here’s the song. I think this just shows Avie has lost it.

    Eye Of The Tiger

    * transcribed by Frantic Freddy, on request *

    SURVIVOR – EYE OF THE TIGER

    Risin’ up, back on the street

    Did my time, took my chances

    Went the distance, now I’m back on my feet

    Just a man and his will to survive

    So many times, it happens too fast

    You change your passion for glory

    Don’t lose your grip on the dreams of the past

    You must fight just to keep them alive

    Chorus:

    It’s the eye of the tiger, it’s the cream of the fight

    Risin’ up to the challenge of our rival

    And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night

    And he’s watchin’ us all in the eye of the tiger

    Face to face, out in the heat

    Hangin’ tough, stayin’ hungry

    They stack the odds ’til we take to the street

    For we kill with the skill to survive

    chorus

    Risin’ up, straight to the top

    Have the guts, got the glory

    Went the distance, now I’m not gonna stop

    Just a man and his will to survive

    chorus

    The eye of the tiger (repeats out)…

  8. 2000guitars says:

    I can’t hold back, I’m on the edge…

    I think that would be appropriate…

  9. PoisedNoise says:

    I always thought it was “it’s the Dream [not cream] of the fight”, but hey, what do I know…

  10. Foginator says:

    Stallone is making his comeback too! Get the real “Eye of the Tiger” on stage at NAB to demo spotlight and Coreimage! The keynote we’ll never forget!

    (or understand)

  11. Streetrabbit says:

    Hang on…I did some cage rattling in the last post of the last…post and nobodys taken the bait.

    TAKE THE BAIT!!!

    And in case someone posts 10 while I’m typing I’ll claim eleventh.

  12. Jon says:

    If you’ve seen the news lately, Tentaculous has been assaulting a planet called Telvania that just happens to be inhabited by a race of extraordinary software engineers. Coincidence? I think not.

  13. leftshoe says:

    I’m new,

    is this where I congradulate my self for getting nth post?

  14. leftshoe says:

    or do I make some witty comment about tigers and apple excutives?

  15. MacPower says:

    I am…

    THE POWER!!!

    pleasecanImakeawittyremark?

  16. Tristrami says:

    Tiger, Tiger, burning bright

    Introducing new Spotlight,

    What immortal hand or eye

    Could find old files so easily?

    In what distant cache or eyrie

    Sav’d the file(s) of thine desire?

    Of what games dare they, Aspyr?

    That Steve Ballmer’s such a liar

    And what folder and what clipart

    Could elude the puchase in thy cart?

    And Dashboard widgets will appear,

    or QUicktime makes video “crystal clear”

    What the mouse? What the iPod?

    Who told you Jobs like a God?

    What the rumors? That New OS X

    Will support the Bots that Sex?

    When the stars threw down their spears,

    When Steve J. says “One more thing…”

    And the cherubim start to sing,

    Will we smile or cuss and damn?

    Since we’ll need so much more RAM?

    Tiger, Tiger, etc., etc.

    Apologies to William Blake

  17. Streetrabbit says:

    Bravo Sir! (or Madam)

  18. Lost in translation says:

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  19. Psyko says:

    MARK

  20. greenacres says:

    OF THE TIGER?!

  21. greenacres says:

    What a mess, I had a cat once that marked his territory outside….Should Jobs mark his territory like Jack Nicholson did in that Wolf movie on Steve Balmer? That I’d pay to see…

  22. Little Bigger says:

    Tristrami, good…in theory.

  23. Del says:

    I have to agree “I Can’t Hold Back” is much better than “Eye of the Tiger”.

    Anyone who had to listen to EVERY marching band for 4 years play that damn song understands. You’d go to a competition and every school would play that song. I still can’t listen to it.

  24. twenty four!

    Of course, they can’t have Survivor without Sly! Since Sylvester Stallone (former PRoN star) and the lead singer of Survivor are brothers.

    Tevannian will blow a gasket if they have Sly and Survivor on the Stage with Steve Jobs.

    The Three S’s.

    Tevannian will probalby change his hame to Superman or something just to have it start with an S so he could fit in.

    Yeah, and did you know Tiger has sexbots avatars for the log-in photos? Yep. You can make book on that fact.

  25. Oh crap, I can’t get get 24 right! How will I ever make #1?

    I know, I know, as long as Steve is alive…

    …we’ll see about that…

  26. the7ofSwords says:

    Great spoof on Blake, Tristrami.

    BUT, I have to take issue with this:

    “What the rumors? That New OS X

    Will support the Bots that Sex?”

    There’s no rhyme there. A couple of others were questionable, but I chalk that up to poetic license. Rhyming “Ten” with “Sex”, though…. that doesn’t even come close!

    7

  27. 2000guitars says:

    one could say

    What the rumors, that there are lots

    Who hope there will be Sexbots…

  28. JAV says:

    Survivor did a Starbucks commercial using Eye of the Tiger, and look how big Starbucks are now!

    http://humor.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJ&sdn=humor&zu=http%3A%2F%2Fcollegehumor.com%2F%3Fmovie_id%3D55249

  29. Psyko says:

    My band never played “Eye of the Tiger” in marching band, but we played it for pep band. I am a trumpet player, a good one thank you very much, and love playing that song. Very loud and very fun.

    MARK

    (If you spell “MARK” wrong you get “ARMK”)

    MARK

  30. Del says:

    AHHHHHHHHHH

    NOOOOO!

  31. Psyko says:

    What did I do this time?

    MARK

  32. Del says:

    Eh I don’t know.. I think the thought of pep bands playing that song as well as marching bands was too much for my fragile little mind.

    Plus I think Steve knows if he wants Tiger to really rock he needs to get Journey. Journey is way cooler than Survivor.

  33. leftshoe says:

    I to have become mortally afraid of eye of the tigger…….

    You have no idea how many times I have heard that song played badly on guitar and trumpet.

    It still haunts my dreams.

  34. Ace Deuce says:

    What is this “Eye of the Tiger” which you speak of? I have never heard it, nor do I wish to.

    Avie and the gang are missing the boat on this one. The best way to promote Tiger via music is with a virtual supergroup. A ghostly band of departed icons, melded together with Logic Pro and Final Cut pro, playing perhaps a Tigrine type of song. I nominate Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Louis Armstrong, Paganini, Frank Zappa, Gram Parsons, Eric Dolphy and Ray Charles for the front line.

    The Death-Challenged Ensemble.

  35. Bellidancer says:

    Interesting Ensemble: three guitars, a violin, a clarinet, a pianist, trumpeter, and a singer. What? No drummer?

  36. Ace Deuce says:

    All right already– for the rhythm section, let’s have Keith Moon. Art Blakey, and John Bonham on drums. Bass: Jaco Pastorius and Charles Mingus. Piano: Nat Cole and Art Tatum. Johann Sebatian Bach will cover the pipe organ.

    And Kurt Cobain will scream.

  37. 2000guitars says:

    What about Vic Wooten?

    Huh huh?

    He rocks baby!

    (not Literally)

    (actually not sure if he HAS any babies)

  38. Streetrabbit says:

    The dead band would have to have Jim Morrison, Michael Hutchence, Joe Strummer and Freddie Mercury nude kick boxing for lead vocal.

  39. greenacres says:

    I DID not need that visual…bleagh…

  40. Anonymous says:

    Victor Wooten does indeed rock, but he’s not dead yet, so he can’t be in the super group.