Hey! The weather’s great in Tacoma and we’ve officially declared it “Fun in the Sun” days here at the top secret Crazy Apple Rumors Site headquarters! Here’s our itinerary for the week:
MONDAY: Schiller’s coming over for barbecued bison burgers and beers!
TUESDAY: Driving all night until we get to John Dvorak’s place, with the top down and the music blaring and the hydraulic-converted 1963 Chevy Impala all hoppin’, wearing our sleeveless t-shirts and our sunglasses – even though it’s totally dark out and stuff but we’re just that cool – and leanin’ out of the car and clankin’ some Coke bottles together and yellin’ “Dvooooooooooorak! C’mout-n-plaaaaay-ay!”
And then pretty much turning around and driving all the way home, leaving him standing on his porch in his bathrobe totally freaked out.
WEDNESDAY: Sprinting barefoot back and forth across the parking lot yelling “OUCH! OWIE! HOT! HOT! OWIE! OOCH! OUCH! OUCH! HOT!” with a MacBook Pro strapped to each foot.
THURSDAY: Drinking mojitos and watching Amanda Congdon and Masako engage in a 3-hour-long topless slow kiss in the CARS pool.
FRIDAY: Realizing Thursday was just an alcohol-inspired dream sequence, but not really minding because – at the end of the day – we’ll still have the memories.
Sounds like a full week! Which means, of course, we won’t have time for monitoring rumors or checking for Apple press releases or posting or, really, bathing.
But… you understand.
Oh, hey, Phil! Have a delicious Mirror Pond Pale Ale™!
[This edition of Crazy Apple Rumors Site will, if we have anything to say about it, one day be brought to you by Deschutes Brewery, makers of Mirror Pond Pale Ale™.]