Many irresponsible sources have been spreading a lot of erroneous information about the iMacs to be announced next Tuesday and Crazy Apple Rumors Site would like to set the record straight.
For starters, contrary to popular belief, they will not be aluminum and they will not feature thin, laptop-style keyboards. Clearly people referencing these specs have simply been having feverish dreams after using their MacBook Pros.
Some have stated as fact that these iMacs will feature Apple’s patented pudding over IP technology. This is false. It’s absurd. Preposterous. Everyone knows pudding over IP will appear first in the new Mac Pros that will be announced at Macworld.
Furthermore, several sites have reported that the 2007 iMacs will be hand-crafted by Nepalese virgins from the finest sandalwood. Wrong. That’s the iPhone rev. 2.
Finally, there’s absolutely no truth to the rumors that when Steve Jobs unveils them, the new iMacs will be covered in a protoplasmic ooze that is a by-product of the process by which new Apple products are born from his body.
They’re totally going to clean that stuff off before Tuesday’s event.
Like they’d leave Steve goop all over them.