Mac Community, John Siracusa To Wed.

The parents of everyone in the Mac community are proud to announce that all their sons and daughters are engaged to Ars Technica’s John Siracusa.

While one glowing review after another of Siracusa’s Leopard review were still warm from the digital presses, it was the Mac community and Siracusa who found a warmth growing between them.

“I really got the sense they loved my review and, consequently, me,” Siracusa said. “So, we had a little dinner, went to a movie, one thing led to another and…

“Now we’re getting married!”

For its part, the Mac community expressed its undying love for Siracusa and his reviews, as forum posts and blog comments overflowed with remarks such as “You know his reviews are good because they’re so long!” and “He must be smart because I have no idea what he’s talking about!”

It was the review that nurtured a love that defied social norms.

While many were at a loss to explain how the engagement of a technology writer and an entire community could come about, one person thought he had the answer.

“This really just kind of snowballed,” said a sheepish Phil Schiller.

“I just got sick of everyone going on and on about how much they looooved Siracusa’s Leopard review – which in many parts was quite critical of Leopard – and what a literary god Siracusa is and Siracusa, Siracusa, Siracusa! So, I said to the Mac community, ‘Well, if you love him so much, why don’t you marry him?!’

“And, um, here we are.”

The wedding date is set for January 15, 2008. The Mac community will wear white and Guy Kawasaki will give the bride away.

20 thoughts on “Mac Community, John Siracusa To Wed.”

  1. Well, *I* understood what Siracusa was talking about. It’s as easy as operating an alternating Stanifran joint with your left-handed monkey wrench. Kromulant! Extremely kromulant!

  2. Where is everyone tonight? Lining up outside the church already? It’s 75 days away … and the wedding is set for MacWorld keynote day… what’s with that?

    oh and 5?

  3. Some of the review I understood. Words like, “and’, that”, “where” and several pronouns.

    Maybe I could just have an affair with the guy, marriage is such a commitment.

  4. Well, I know that not everyone will be, or should I say should be wearing white.

    You all know who you are….

  5. I predict the marriage will go well at first but John will become more and more bitter due to the mac community fooling with his stereo settings and moving his stuff so its no longer where he left it (he hates that).

  6. Is there a wedding present list ?
    Are there some spoons on it ? I alwys choose spoons.
    Don’t know why, exactly.

    Everybody needs a spoon, no ?

    SpoooooOOOOOOOooooooonnnnn !

  7. I’ll take a wild guess that this wedding will take place in Utah. Or Kentucky. Or Arkansas. One of those fly-over places where things like this happen.

    Will there be a problem if my wife uses Windoze? I’d hate to have to try to get a divorce over this. I’m not sure if that qualifies as “irreconcilable differences” in my state. Which, in case you’re wondering, is Confusion.

  8. All the Google ads are for Hydrocodone detox, which I’m guessing Moltzy needs after writing this.

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