Jobs' Bathroom Conversation Caught On Tape.

Just days after CNN host Kyra Phillips forgot to turn off her microphone and was heard on-the-air in the bathroom, a recording of Apple CEO Steve Jobs in the bathroom at WWDC has surfaced.

Sources on the sound crew at WWDC forwarded to Crazy Apple Rumors Site a recording of a conversation between Jobs and Senior Vice President of Worldwide Marketing Phil Schiller – which apparently took place just after the keynote – in the Moscone Center men’s room.

JOBS: [Whistling what sounds like John Lennon’s Imagine.]

[Sound of the bathroom door opening.]


JOBS: Oh! Hi, Phil.

[The sound of a zipper being opened]

SCHILLER: Good… good keynote!

JOBS: Yeah? You think? I thought it might have been a little… flat.

SCHILLER: Oh, no! No! No. No. Well… no. We killed ’em with the iChat bit.

JOBS: Heh. Yeah. Yeah.

SCHILLER: Heh-heh. Yeaaaaaah.

[A prolonged silence followed by more whistling.]

JOBS: Sooo…


JOBS: Uh… see that… game… last night?

SCHILLER: Uh, hockey doesn’t start until October.

JOBS: Oh. Isn’t there… baseball or something?

SCHILLER: Nyeah, but the Sox are…

JOBS: The… Sox?

SCHILLER: The Red Sox.

JOBS: Oh. I’ve heard of them. I like that Damon guy.

SCHILLER: Uh… yeah. He’s, um… not… well. Yeah.

[A prolonged silence followed by more whistling.]

SCHILLER: I’m just realizing this but… we’ve never… been in the bathroom at the same time before.

JOBS: No. I guess you’re right.

SCHILLER: How is that possible? We’ve been working together for a long time.

JOBS: Well, I don’t go to the bathroom at Apple.

SCHILLER: You… don’t…

JOBS: No. I find that if I have a full bladder, I work better. I have a bigger sense of urgency in everything I do.

SCHILLER: Oh. Wow. That’s… that’s cool. Sort of twisted zen kind of thing. Maybe I should try…

JOBS: I’m so messing with you.

SCHILLER: Wha… Oh! Ha-ha! Ahhh, you got me!

JOBS: Yeah. I don’t really do that.

[A prolonged silence followed by more whistling.]

SCHILLER: So, what’s the deal with [VP of platform experience Scott] Forstall?

JOBS: The… deal?

SCHILLER: Yeah. Kind of an attitude problem.

JOBS: Oh. I hadn’t noticed.

SCHILLER: Yeah, I was talking about it with Peter.

JOBS: Hmm, well, I haven’t experienced that. I did notice he smells like feet.

SCHILLER: Oh. My. God! What is that?!

JOBS: I’m guessing it’s his feet.

SCHILLER: Oh, man, I hope so!

JOBS: Ha-ha!


[The sound of a bathroom stall opening followed by sharp footsteps.]

FORSTALL: I have a condition!

[Sharp footsteps followed by the sound of the bathroom door opening then closing.]

SCHILLER: Did you see that?

JOBS: I did.

SCHILLER: He didn’t wash his hands.

JOBS: Tsk.

SCHILLER: Tsk. And on top of that, he’s got an attitude problem.

JOBS: Yeah, I heard that. Oh… hey… wait a minute. Is this microphone still on?

You know, I often feel compelled to provide some kind of analysis for these transcripts but I’m just never sure where to go.