Study Shows Mac Market Share Soaring.

Several recent studies have shown that Mac market share is creeping up, but a study released today shows that it has reached record levels.

According to several Mac users who got together and published a paper in the prestigious publication Mac Scientific Papers Magazine, the anecdotal evidence is overwhelming: more people than ever “can has Macs”.

“My anecdotal evidence clearly shows Mac market share is way higher than previously thought,” said paper co-author Josh Raney. “I just keep running into switchers.”

Just this morning, according to Raney, he met yet another “dude” who’s switching to the Mac.

Co-author Jeremy Dingess said “Everyone I know and hang out with uses Macs, so my anecdotal results show its market share to be 100%. Of course, some of that is just selection, so I’m willing to accept that in the real world, the results are somewhat different.”

Accordingly, Dingess and Raney estimated the Mac’s market share to be somewhere around 75%.

“I mean, it’s totally scientifically valid but, also, it just felt right, you know?”

In other statistical news, an experiment conducted today revealed that roughly 3% of Apple’s stock is owned by frightened little bunnies that sell and buy based on noises they hear coming from the tall, tall grass near farmer MacGregor’s vegetable garden.

21 thoughts on “Study Shows Mac Market Share Soaring.”

  1. Segundo, and I didn’t read the article, so I have no life and I’m a phailure 😀

  2. Statistically speaking, I have .73 life, which is up from the .55 I had in the last poll.

  3. So Apple’s financial future is in the hands of Beatrix Potter characters.

    Can things get better?

  4. I almost gave up on tonight’s episode, too, but only because it was so long and detailed, and my powers of concentration are shot since I started hearing all those noises coming from the tall, tall grass. There’s something in there, by God. I am not imagining things.

  5. The tall, tall grass in Farmer MacGregor’s garden musta hadda bigole wolf turd in it today. Theys a unbroken stream o rabbit piss all the way to the other side o the pasture.

    On the other hand, I’m in full agreement on the 100% thing. Everybody I know either uses a Mac or damn sure knows they should. Maybe that’s why I always get a table to myself in the cafeteria these days.

    Still, the statistics hold up.

  6. For centuries the definition of Mac has been debated vociferously. Is it just the computing device, as some will have you believe, or is it the baseball cap on your head or the coffee mug on your desk right now? A pencil. Is it a Mac? This is a conundrum that has confounded 0.8% of philosophers since the term Mac was first introduced to the language all those many years ago. Within these bounds I attest that the Mac has 100% or greater market share.

  7. I can’t believe I had to read an entire article from CARS about Apple market share and didn’t get to see a single quip about ‘penetration’.

    I think they’re starting to lose their edge. Clearly their energies are going elsewhere.

    Personally, I blame the Norwegian women’s volleyball team.

  8. I’m holding all my Apple shares for now–all none of them. No panic sell-off for me, no sir!

    “Penetration.” Heh…

  9. “In other statistical news, an experiment conducted today revealed that roughly 3% of Apple’s stock is owned by frightened little bunnies that sell and buy based on noises they hear coming from the tall, tall grass near farmer MacGregor’s vegetable garden.”

    I’d say that’s an understatement.
    In fact, I’d say a significant proportion of the whole market is owned by these elusive little bunnies.
    It’s nice to be at the top of the investor food chain.
    Oh, excuse me, I have a roast bunny I need to turn on the spit, be right back…

  10. Oh, people can come up with statistics to prove anything. Fourty percent of people know that.
    – Homer Simpson

    Since I’m stealing Homer quotes, some other favorites include:

    To alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.

    Don’t worry – Being eaten by a crocodile is just like going to sleep – In a giant blender!

    Donuts, is there anything they can’t do?

    Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that’s even remotely true!

    First you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

    Good things don’t end in “eum” they end in “mania”… or “teria”.

    How come things that happen to stupid people keep happening to me!?

    I don’t have to be careful, I got a gun!

    I hope I didn’t brain my damage.

    I saw weird stuff in that place last night. Weird, strange, sick, twisted, eerie, godless, evil stuff. And I want in.

    I thought I had an appetite for destruction, but all I wanted was a club sandwich.

    I’m in no condition to drive. Wait – I shouldn’t listen to myself, I’m drunk!

    It’s not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to fit in eight hours of TV a day.

    Just because I don’t care doesn’t mean I don’t understand.

    My back yard makes my front yard look like an idiot.

    Oh, everything looks bad if you remember it.

    Son, a woman is a lot like a… [looks around] a refrigerator! They’re about six feet tall, 300 pounds. They make ice and, um… [spots his can of Duff] Oh, wait a minute. Actually, a woman is more like a beer. They smell good, they look good and you’d step over your own mother just to get one! [downs the beer] But you can’t stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

    The lesson is: Our God is vengeful! [shouting to Heaven] Oh spiteful one, show me who to smite and they shall be smoten.

    “To start, press any key.” Where’s the “any” key?! I see Kuh-tor-ull, Esc, and Pig-Up, but I don’t see the “Any” key! woah, all this computer hacking is making me thirsty, I think I’ll order a tab. (Presses tab key) Ooh, too late for that now, the computers starting!

    All right brain, I don’t like you and you don’t like me, so let’s just do this so I can get back to killing you with beer.


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