Crazy Apple Rumors Site is dedicated to the fabrication of Apple rumors that defy verifiability, grammatical convention or any basis in reality. Crazy Apple Rumors Site is not affiliated with Apple Computer, Crazy Eddie, the Fleetwood Mac “Rumors” album, Mack Trucks, the Washington State Apple Growers Association, the Vatican Secret Service, or Victoria’s Secret (despite the large collection of their catalogs in the CARS’ men’s room). Any similarity to existing Apple rumors sites is purely coincidental. As a matter of fact, any similarity to an actual web site with content, readers, and advertisers is not only coincidental but really rather unlikely, don’t you think? Should any member of the CARS team be caught or killed, the secretary will disavow any knowledge of our actions. She’s really adamant about that. All cease and desist orders should be directed to Steve Ballmer, Microsoft Corporation, Redmond, WA. He’s the big freak, after all. Lubrication provided by Deschutes Brewing, makers of Mirror Pond Pale Ale. All meals catered at great expense by Honoki of Roppongi, Tokyo, and are flown in daily. Try the miso eggplant. It’s exquisite. Guests of Crazy Apple Rumors Site fly Aer Lingus, strangely enough, and stay at the Silver Cloud Inn in Tacoma, in the luxurious Crazy Apple Rumors Suite.

21 thoughts on “About”

  1. Dude, I can’t believe you haven’t caught up with FreestateTV in so long! How rude man! Maybe Tony is right though. SELL SELL SELL. Don’t buy. Especially from those links…

  2. Long time no see, I was just posting to see if you were still around. It’s been so long since we’ve been able to sit down and have a conversation. Youcan get ahold of me through my blog below on the contact section.

  3. What what it must have done? Please be more specific. Perhaps you have smoked too many wholesale cigarettes and the communication center in your brain has become addled. The surgeon general has found that smoking non-retail cigarettes can cause you to smoke extra cigarettes.

  4. I am contacting you to direct me to the person in charge of your web content. I would like to add an Auto Insurance quoting link on your website. I pay anywhere between $4-$6 per click. Please get back to me if interested.

  5. Mr. Moltz,

    I will reward you handsomely if would be so kind as to restore functionality to the page on your site known affectionately as the Giga-Post (The Mega-Post is Dead). Some of us regulars find life almost meaningless without it, for reasons unknown to science.


    “Internal Server Error

    The server encountered an internal error or misconfiguration and was unable to complete your request.

    Please contact the server administrator, root and inform them of the time the error occurred, and anything you might have done that may have caused the error.

    More information about this error may be available in the server error log.”

  6. What the hell are all these posts doing here?

    It’s like I’ve entered the bleedin’ twilight zone…

  7. Hello,

    Your time is valuable so I’ll be quick and to the point.

    I am on your site and notice that you do not have many 3rd-party ads on your site.The Entity writes the checks, but I,m sure he would not mind some more revenue. I run a performance-based ad agency and I specialize in helping to optimize and increase advertising revenue, by providing highly-targeted ads with high payouts.

    I don’t get paid if I can’t help you increase your ad revenue – so it’s all on me. You risk nothing.

    If you’re interested, let me know and I’ll provide the banners for your site.

    You may also contact me at tafficbrokerage@gmail.com.


    Natalie Newby

  8. Hello,

    I’d like to inquire if it’s possible to purchase advertising space on crazyapplerumors.com

    If there is any space available please let me know and we could discuss further details.

    Looking forward to your positive reply.


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