06 Apr 04Microsoft Reveals Office Ad Campaign.

With the release of Office 2004 for the Macintosh just a month away, Microsoft’s Macintosh Business Unit has settled on an advertising campaign designed to appeal to the Mac user’s Apple sensibilities.

Building on Apple’s iLife advertising campaign that says “It’s like Microsoft Office for the rest of your life, Microsoft will sell Office under the slogan “It’s like Microsoft Office.”

Mac Business Unit general manager Roz Ho was enthusiastic about the campaign.

“It works on so many levels!” Ho effused. “Because, indeed, Microsoft Office is much like Microsoft Office. Spookily like Microsoft Office. Eerily like Microsoft Office. Frighteningly like Microsoft Office.

“Some say…” Ho, added, pausing for dramatic effect, “…it is Microsoft Office.”

Ho smiled wryly, raised her eyebrows and nodded knowingly.

The campaign, however, has fallen flat with Mac users.

“I think they screwed up the metaphor, didn’t they?” asked long-time Mac user and supporter Damien Barrett. “Shouldn’t it have been ‘It’s like iLife for your office’ or something?”

“No, no,” said author and Mac user Dori Smith. “It’s not a metaphor. It’s a simile.

“They screwed up the simile.”

Holding his thumb and forefingers up in a “W”, Barrett mouthed “Whatever” and continued.

“I’m just saying, it doesn’t make any sense. It’s not even ‘It’s, like, Microsoft Office.’ Like… y’know! It’s, like, Microsoft Office, dude! It’s not even that! It’s just some misplaced comparison.”

Simile,” Smith corrected. “It’s a misplaced simile.”

Uncomfortable advertising campaigns are not new for Microsoft’s Macintosh products. Word 6 was sold under the catch-phrase “It sucks, but it was so much easier for us to code.” When Apple made Internet Explorer the default browser, Microsoft trumpeted the application’s position in several Mac-related magazine ads that read “We own your azz, beeotch!”

Office ships in May and continues to cost a lot.

No Responses to “Microsoft Reveals Office Ad Campaign.”

  1. tim etherington says:

    Okay, this is just CARS humor!

  2. The Illuminati strike again.

  3. Aaron says:

    Apple is just proving what the poets have always known:

    Simile and the world similes with you.

  4. Edward Liu says:


    Hey, you guys forgot the ad campaign when Microsoft bought Bungie. The traditional back-cover MacAddict ad was replaced first by, “You think you’re getting a groundbreaking game first? DREAM ON, MACBOY!” and then a second one that said, “Bungie fans: M1cR0$0f+ PWNZ J00!”

    — Ed

  5. EMan says:

    Just be glad Microsoft doesn’t make sexbots. *shudder*

  6. MAMEBase says:

    Ah, but if Microsoft made sexbots, they would be transvestite sexbots that look an awful lot like Apple sexbots from a distance…

  7. LVG says:

    Um, how exactly do you put your “thumb and forefingers up in a “W”,”

    It seems so much more natural to use your ring, midle and index finger. Silly CARS and their fingering.

  8. Shivs says:

    You know… in front of you left index at aright angle to left thumb, then the same with the right thumb and index and touch your thumb tips together at a less than straight angle. \/\/ sort of!

  9. Dori Smith says:

    Uh oh, now you’re going to have my editors thinking that I might actually know something about this language I’m paid to write in.

    OTOH, yes, I really am that anal.

  10. Al says:

    “Office ships in May and continues to cost a lot.”

    Funniest sentence I’ve read today, in context 🙂

  11. Del says:

    I like Microsoft’s Advertising Campaign for Halo. “We liked the game so much we bought the company… and refused to let them release it for any other OS/Gaming System. So now you have to buy our Xbox. MWaaahhhahhhahhhahhah”

    You know I don’t think there are many companies with the balls to use MWaaahhhahhhahhhahhah effectivly in an ad campaign.

  12. MICHAEL EISNER says:

    apple 27.83

    microsoft 25.80


  13. Larry (OK, not really) says:

    A metaphor is an implied comparison, as in, “He was a lion in battle.”

    A simile is an explicit comparison, as in, “He fought like a lion in battle”

    A jerk is someone like me who posts an explanation of the useless difference between these two figures of speech.

  14. Anonymous says:

    Uh, I’m no MSFT supporter but stock price doesn’t have much to do with the value of a company. You might be more interested in this info:

    MSFT: Market Cap: 278.50B

    AAPL: Market Cap: 10.29B

  15. fuddes says:

    That’s pretty funny, but do you know what’s *really* funny? Dogs with hats on. Oh man, seeing that cracks me up every time! Dogs with hats! I mean, when will it end!

  16. ozzo says:

    Release the Bits!

  17. Laemkral says:

    WANG! WHO told you about the Illuminati!?!?!

    Cause….uh….they don’t exist….nope. Non-existant, not real, totally made up.

    *opens cell phone and makes a call*

    Tell Agents Alpha through Golf that the India have been revealed. Get out, get out!

  18. Spiro T. Agnew says:

    Yeah, dogs with hats. That takes me back. But you know what’s really funny? When they dress up parrots in those pirate costumes. Man, I laugh so hard that I pass string cheese through my nose.

  19. Del says:

    Dog’s with hats are NOT funny. My dad had a painting by the guy who did the dogs playing poker. It’s a Collie in a hat and coat and my sister and I are STILL traumatized by it.

    We’ve been fighting for years over who has to take it when the parents pop off. The way those evil eyes follow you around the room. And collies are smart! If he’s in a coat maybe he has car keys in those pockets. Or maybe even a knife… You can’t trust that breed. Turn your back on them and they will run you down with your own car.

  20. Spiro T. Agnew says:

    and they said my boss was paranoid.

  21. Dwartz Farquhartz says:

    I asked my collie to “speak” about this issue, and he said, “woof! woof woof woof!”

    Which I’m pretty sure means, “about that running over you in your own car thing. You know, cars aren’t exactly ergonomically friendly to dogs. Keep leaving us in the car, running so we don’t die of heat stroke while you’re looking at sea mist ceramic tile at the Home Depot, and eventually we’re gonna *accidentally* hit the gearshift and run someone over. News flash, humans: WE CAN’T REACH THE PEDALS.

    So stop blaming us everytime some stupid human gets run over by a car being driven by a collie.”

    That’s what I think he was saying. Of course, he could have been lying through his canines.

  22. ipodguy says:

    Simile. Ya it was a simile, and when is Office going to get cheaper. I submit that it never.

  23. MICHAEL EISNER says:

    THERE IS A VERY INEXPENSIVE SOURCE FOR OFFICE. It’s called your friends copy.

  24. Jan says:

    … and Open Office doesn’t cost anything …



  25. marko says:

    “…the guy who did the dogs playing poker…”

    That’s funny….

  26. Spiro T. Agnew says:

    ‘Dogs playing poker’ is actually a devastating satire on corporate greed with the dogs representing industrialists, the cards are workers, the chips are money and the cigar is just a cigar.