30 Nov 04Corrections.


Crazy Apple Rumors Site would like to issue the following corrections.

  • A link in a story two weeks ago to a letter from interface expert Jef Raskin indicating his interface project has received $2 million dollars should have been a link to MC Rebbe, the Rapping Rabbi. Because everybody love the Rapping Rabbi. Raskin? Not so much. All links have been updated appropriately.
  • An article about the iTunes Music Store indicated that Justin Timberlake substantially increased his credibility by performing with the Black Eyed Peas’ on Where Is The Love? We neglected to mention, however, that the Black Eyed Peas substantially damaged their credibility by performing with Justin Timberlake. We regret the omission.
  • I recently took a left turn onto a one-way street. I thought it was OK, but later realized that the street I was on was two-way, so someone could have turned left in front of me while I was turning and… I don’t know, I’m not sure what the correct thing is there. I just thought I’d mention it.
  • Gil Amelio really should never have been made CEO of Apple. And don’t get me started on Michael Spindler. Sheesh.
  • Thursday’s lunch special was not, as stated, fish sticks. It was, in fact, corn dogs that had had something heavy put on top of them in the walk-in freezer and… well, they just looked like fish sticks. All flat and everything. Just… you know. Well. We regret the error.
  • Finally, our thirteen-part series detailing the close relationship between Avie Tevanian, the Japanese Yakuza and a shadowy worldwide assasination organization known only as “The Hand”, entitled Faster Technocrat, Kill, Kill, was meant to have been a puff piece about the iPod Socks and how everyone loves them and puppies and kittens and happy spring fun time!

This fulfills our periodic commitment per the terms of a binding legal agreement with Apple Computer and State of Washington.

And, um, several public interest groups.

And…

Well, there were some other parties. Let’s just leave it at that.

36 Responses to “Corrections.”

  1. Ambrose Chapel says:

    happy spring fun time!

  2. Daddy Bartholomew says:

    I’m shocked. Shocked, I say, that I am not first.

  3. Ambrose Chapel says:

    yeah, and i wrote out happy spring fun time. that was no time-saving copypaste job!

  4. Der Ledehosen says:

    Verrückter Applegerüchtaufstellungsort möchte die folgenden Korrekturen herausgeben. Vor eine Verbindung in einer Geschichte zwei Wochen zu einem Buchstaben von der Schnittstelle, die sachverständiges Jef Raskin, das sein Schnittstellenprojekt anzeigt, Dollar $2 Million empfangen hat, sollte eine Verbindung zu MC Rebbe, das RAPRabbi gewesen sein. Weil jeder Liebe das RAPRabbi. Raskin? Nicht soviel. Alle Verbindungen sind passend aktualisiert worden. Ein Artikel über den iTunesmusikspeicher zeigte an, daß Justin Timberlake im wesentlichen seine Glaubwürdigkeit erhöhte, indem er an mit den schwarzen Erbsen Eyed durchführte, wo die Liebe ist? Wir vernachlässigten zu erwähnen jedoch daß die schwarzen Erbsen Eyed im wesentlichen ihre Glaubwürdigkeit beschädigten, indem sie mit Justin Timberlake durchführten. Wir bedauern die Auslassung. Ich nahm vor kurzem eine linke Umdrehung auf eine Einwegstraße. Ich dachte, daß sie OKAY war, aber später festgestellt, daß die Straße, die ich war eingeschaltet, Zweiweg war, also jemand nach links vor mir sich gedreht haben könnte, während ich mich drehte und…, Ich weiß nicht, ich bin nicht sicher, was die korrekte Sache dort ist. Ich dachte gerade, daß ich sie erwähnen würde. Gil Amelio wirklich sollte nie gebildet worden sein CEO von Apple. Und erhalten Sie mich nicht begonnen auf Michael Spindler. Sheesh. Das Mittagessen Donnerstags, das speziell ist, war nicht, wie angegeben, Fischstöcke. Es war tatsächlich Maishunde, die etwas schweres gut gesetzt auf sie in der walk-in Gefriermaschine und… gehabt hatten, sie aussah gerade wie Fischstöcke. Ganz flach und alles. Gerade… Sie wissen. Brunnen. Wir bedauern die Störung. Schließlich wurde unsere Dreizehnteil-Reihe, die das nahe Verhältnis zwischen Avie Tevanian, das japanische Yakuza und eine shadowy weltweite assasinationorganisation bekannt ist nur als “die Hand”, erlaubt schnelleren Technokraten, Tötung, Tötung genau schildert, bedeutet, ein Hauchstück über die iPodsocken gewesen zu sein und wie jeder sie und Welpen und Kittens und glückliche Frühlingsspaßzeit liebt! Dieses erfüllt unsere periodische Verpflichtung pro die Bezeichnungen einer verbindlichen zugelassenen Vereinbarung mit Apple-Computer und des Zustandes von Washington. Und, um, einige allgemeine Interessengruppen. Und…

  5. Gag Halfrunt says:

    I like lederhosen

  6. Handlebar mustache says:

    Big men in leather shorts!!!!!

    Oh my.

  7. Leather Tuscadero says:

    But, the question is if you need legal briefs to enter into a binding legal agreement, while wearing leather shorts.

  8. Ozi says:

    someone had TOO much time on their hands, to translate the entire article into Deutsch.

    Deary me! 😛

  9. dean summerville says:

    What you slovenly refer to as “The Hand” should always be properly referred to as: “The 45 Sliding Hands of Doom (In One Perfect-Sized Box)” (a.k.a “Evil Fish Sticks: Bane of Armageddon”), but we’ll let you slide on this.

    FOR NOW!

    d.s. (for the evil Fish Sticks of Freezer Faliure)

  10. Massen Gill says:

    Oh, my boyhood days running through the hills of vinegar and water.

  11. Josh says:

    Pudding!!!!!!111

  12. Anonymous says:

    I think this site should be renamed “Verrückter Applegerüchtaufstellungsort”. Yeah.

  13. Aaron says:

    Everybody tells me to talk to The Hand, but…

  14. Aaron says:

    So what is German for “¡Los rumores de Apple más locos!” ?

  15. Aaron says:

    And shouldn’t that be “¡Los rumores de Manzana más locos!” anyway?

  16. Esteban Trabajo says:

    Manzana is copyrighted. Please cease and desist from using the Manzana trademark.

  17. MacStansbury says:

    no fair actually posting a story at a decent hour EST.

    no fair.

  18. UhhhDude says:

    Any retractions regarding lesbians or sexbots (or lesbian sexbots, for that matter) should be directed to the appropriate email address:

    steveballmer@microsoft.com

    or

    lederhosen@kraftwerk.com

    Please use correct postage.

  19. some guy says:

    ha postage… because you know, steve “where did i leave that banana” ballmer is completely in support of one of those

    he is…

    at least my ape joke still stands

    shut up

  20. MacStansbury says:

    first postage?

    /me is bored

  21. Anonymous says:

    Those were the best fish sticks ever! I’m gonna have to start squashing corn dogs on a regular basis.

  22. Steve Ballmer's Rabbit says:

    Is this the Halo 2 forum?

    If so can someone recommend a detergent that’ll get Tiffany Amber Thiessen stains out of lederhosen?

  23. CARS is based in Washington?!?

    That explains a lot.

  24. caerulea says:

    NOT FIRST!

    NOT ELEVENTH EITHER!

  25. John C. Randolph says:

    “Applegerüchtaufstellungsort”?

    Warum heißt das nicht “Apfelgerüchtaufstellungsort”?

    Danke schön,

    -jcr

  26. Anonymous says:

    “Is this the Halo 2 forum?”

    Halo 2 is teh suck. WoW roxxors. (see previous article for in depth analysis)

    “If so can someone recommend a detergent that’ll get Tiffany Amber Thiessen stains out of lederhosen? ”

    Only the clensing heat of the holy flamethrower can save you my child. Make haste!

  27. chris says:

    actually it doesn’t take that much time to go to google, paste in some weird text, press translate to german, and get something even weirder back.

  28. chris says:

    of course you could do it the other way rounnd again:

    Crazy Applegeruechtaufstellungsort would like to publish the following corrections. Before a connection in a history two weeks to a letter of the interface, which received specialreasonable Jef Raskin, which indicates its interface project, dollar $2 million, a connection to MC Rebbe, the RAPRabbi should have been. Because each love the RAPRabbi. Raskin? Not as much. All connections were suitably updated. An article over more iTunesmusikspeicher indicated that Justin Timberlake essentially increased its reliability, by on accomplishing Eyed with the black peas, where the love is? We neglected to mention however that the black peas Eyed essentially their reliability damaged, by accomplishing with Justin Timberlake. We regret the omission. I took recently a left revolution on a one-way road. I thought that it OKAY was, but later determined that the road, which was I switched on, was two-way could have turned thus someone to the left before me, during I turned and…, I white not, I am not safe, which there the correct thing is. I just thought that I would mention her. Gil Amelio really should never formed its CEO von Apple. And you do not keep me begun on Michael Spindler. Sheesh. The lunch of Thursday, which is special, was not, as indicated, fish sticks. It was actually corn dogs, which had had somewhat heavy well set on it in mill in freezing machine and…, them looked straight like fish sticks. Completely flat and everything. Straight one… They know. Well. We regret the disturbance. Finally our thirteen-partial row, which the close relationship between Avie Tevanian, which admits Japanese Yakuza and one shadowy world-wide assasinationorganisation is only as “the hand”, permits of faster Technokraten, toetung, toetung describes exactly, meant, a piece of breath over the iPodsocken to have been and like everyone it and puppies and cementing and lucky spring fun time loves! This fulfills our periodic obligation per the designation of an obligatory certified agreement with Apple computer and the condition of Washington. And, over, some general groups of interests. And…

  29. GLAARKU says:

    “I took recently a left revolution on a one-way road. I thought that it OKAY was, but later determined that the road, which was I switched on, was two-way could have turned thus someone to the left before me, during I turned and…, I white not, I am not safe, which there the correct thing is. I just thought that I would mention her.”

    AHAHAHAHAHA!!! Dat’s a gut vun! Translated text for comedy, think about it won’t you? Thank you.

  30. Del says:

    Holy Flame-thrower!!! Does that mean the iFlame is back?

  31. riscbased says:

    Is it possible to get wednesdays article on wednesday. I feel like i’m living at zero latitude. Or longitude. Whatever.

    You suck.

    P.S. I love the site

  32. MacStansbury says:

    Not while Your Mac Life is on. Wait till that’s over and BAM there’s a crazy Apple-type rumour.

  33. mick says:

    you’re allowed to turn left on red only when you’re turning from a one way street to a one way street. and of course, the traffic on the street you’re turning onto goes to the left.

  34. Steve Ballmer's Rabbit says:

    One time I turned left when I should’ve turned right. I had to turn back to get to my where I was going. This required me to carry out a manouver known to those familiar with the steering wheel as a U-Turn.

  35. How can you misspell assassination? It has “ass” in it!

    Twice!