While Crazy Apple Rumors has been unable to pin down detailed specifications of the machine that will undoubtedly bring the Mac platform to a new level of performance, it has been able to determine that the Power Mac G6 will be really, really shiny.
Sources within Apple’s hardware development division indicate that, indeed, the Mac’s future may be so bright that you will be required, per a special user license agreement, to wear shades.
“This is the logical next step in Apple’s hardware design progression,” said Macworld Magazine editor Jason Snell.
“The first Power Mac G3s were beige. Then came the Blue and White G3, the charcoal G4, the mirror door G4 and finally the aluminum G5s. A really, really shiny G6 is just the next step toward the final goal – a Power Mac that will actually blind its user.
“A lot of people don’t realize this but Apple really doesn’t like its customers,” Snell added.
Snell darkly hinted that incidents such as PowerBook adapters that caught fire and that guy who got beaten with an iPod were no accident. He even went so far as to say that he knew for a fact that the Mac mini was originally supposed to just blow up when plugged in.
While CARS was unable to confirm these allegations, it was able to spot several highly tanned members of the Power Mac development group exiting One Infinite Loop, indicating that Apple is indeed working on really shiny technology.
Currently, the known specifications of the Power Mac G6 are:
- IBM G6 processor
- Firewire 800
- USB 2.0
- Hard drive
- Some kind of graphics card
- Way too little RAM
- Really shiny
Supporting these specs is information from sources at the smelter that Apple usually gets its aluminum from indicating that the company is now asking for large quantities of chrome or other shiny materials such as reflectium or impossium.
Which is not to be confused with possium which is the metal possums are made of.
CARS will pass on more details of the Power Mac G6 as they emerge.