Tiger Installation Tips.


With the release of Tiger, many users will be attempting to install the updated operating system on their Macs. Installing an operating system update is not for amateurs, those faint of heart or anyone who emits a strong magnetic field.

Those people shouldn’t really be near computers at all.

Crazy Apple Rumors Site Labs has collected the following list of tips for the brave souls who will daringly install an entirely untested and highly risky operating system on their computers.

But, um, I’m sure it’ll be fine.

  • A clean install is always better. Reformat your entire hard drive before you install the operating system. You should throw out your old data, too, as it may be corrupted. It also might be best to move to a new city and change your name. Start over with a new life, it’s the only way to be sure.
  • Before installing Tiger on your machine, install it on your mother’s aging iMac first. This will allow you to determine whether or not there are any problems. I mean, at the rate you visit her, it’s not like you’re going to be seeing her again any time soon.
  • Always repair permissions before an OS update. Any expert on OS X will tell you that this is imperative. Just like any high priest of Gorto will tell you to offer a sacrifice to appease Gorto before attempting any endeavor. And both will speak with equal conviction and basis in fact.
  • If at all possible, get yourself a Tiger t-shirt and wear it while you’re installing Tiger. Because, dude, how cool would that be?! w00t!
  • Operating system upgrades will install better if your machine is well-cared for. And well-lubricated. But – ha-ha! – it won’t be necessary to pour a quart of 30-grade motor oil into your Mac! Ha-ha! That would be stupid! And warranty-voiding! No, no, no, no, no. Just jam a stick of butter into your optical drive before you install the disk. Ha-ha! Butter! Ha-ha! Ha! Ha! DO IT! DO IT NOW! BUTTER!
  • Back up all your data. Nobody wants to hear you sobbing like a little girl when your pwecious data gets awll wost. Nooooooo! We don’t want snookums to loose ums data! Ah-boo hoo hoo! Ah-boo-hoo-hoo! You frickin’ pussy.

Oh, screw it. Just go ahead and install it.

53 thoughts on “Tiger Installation Tips.”

  1. Bollocks. I did an upgrade instead of archive and install. Yeh yeah I did th repair permissions etc thing but it’s still snafu-d mysql and php.

    And as for Mail that program’s totally screwed, but that’s Apple’s fault not mine…. :/

  2. This is a bit off-topic (heh heh), but what happened to the Inside Apple post from a few days ago? In the RSS feed it just says “Oops,” and the post has been replaced with “OK, just to be clear here… Did. Not. Know. That.” If I remember correctly, that was the Ayatollah Khomeini one. What happened?

  3. I’m gonna wait until Apple releases Tiger Service Pack 2 b4 I install my copy. (nods head affirmatively)

  4. Hmm, maybe Apple legal got on them for Thursday… But I don’t see how they could, it’s really clearly a parody, what with it involving a dead Ayatollah.

    Hmm, maybe the current Ayatollah complained to CARS? Or maybe Apple threatened to put a hard block on CARS into the next “security update.”

  5. Yeah, now I’m curious about that post now too. Obviously I didn’t know something too, but that message doesn’t help me out any. Aaaah! I could be walking into a death-trap!

  6. Google’s cache says it was never there…so it must be a figment of our imaginations….Wooooooooo, indeed.

  7. Hah! Sagat is no match for Ryu. Where’d he get that big scar, huh? Huh? From the shouryuken that his Tiger Uppercut so lamely wants to be. Lame! Laaaame!

    Pff. Master of Muay Thai Kickboxing. More like Master of Getting Pwned by Emo Martial Arts Guy.

    … Ok, I’m done.

    Considering integers mod 15, this is the first post! Woo!

  8. “OK, just to be clear here…

    Did. Not. Know. That.”

    please explain Moltz, what happened?

  9. Hmm all the instructions are there for installing Tiger – but how do I get rid of Windows first?

  10. Yeah I wanna know what’s up with last week’s inside apple post too. Did the impossible happen and Apple Legal contacted CARS a second time?

    Or did some muslim cleric put a fatwa on John’s head and he removed it?

    Nice Office quote too in it’s place

  11. Switcher- It’s quite simple really. Just throw your computer out (preferably out a high window) and get a new Mac.

  12. Did. So. Know. That. (!)

    (Also, I think we’re all screwed. I’m just not sure by whom, yet.)

  13. I GOT ANNOYED WITH EVERYONE TAKING MY NAME IN VAIN LAST THURDAY! THE SOLUTION INVOLVED BENDING SPACE AND TIME IN SUCH A WAY THAT THURSDAY NEVER HAPPENED!!

    YOU SHOULD ALL THANK ME–AS A RESULT YOU’RE ALL A DAY YOUNGER!!!

  14. I threw my PC out of the window as suggested – but it killed the FedEx guy that just delivered Tiger.

    What are these Mac things – and what have they to do with butter ……….I find this website really confusing

  15. Really you shouldn’t use butter with your mac. Try oleo or margarine. Most Macs tend to be lactose intolerant.

    Also now that you’ve killed the FedEx guy loot his truck. There might be more copies of tiger in there.

  16. CTHULHU,

    That would explain why that project I completed on Thursday suddenly hasn’t been done. I haven’t lost my job over it, but now I have to repeat myself. I hate to repeat myself! I hate to repeat myself!

  17. Also the FedEx truck may have some boxes labeled, iBook, or iMac, or Powerbook. Those are also “Macs”. However, if you see any boxes labeled “PowerMac G5”, those are actually not “Macs” and you should sent those to “Bellidancer”, care of CARS.

  18. In fact, please send all boxes labeled iBook, iMac, PowerBook, Mac mini, or iPod to “the JoshMeister” c/o CARS, since Bellidancer apparently doesn’t want ’em. All those things are very bad, so I’ll take them off your hands for you.

  19. Just installed!

    OS 9.

    Quite a change from OS 8.

    Seems very stable, runs faster & smoother!!

    Oh and by the way i installed on a Power Computing Power Tower Pro 225.

    Not officialy supported i know, but all is fine.

    Thanks!

  20. TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS!

    TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS!

    TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS!

    TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS! TIPS!

  21. I have a Tiger t-shirt, but I wasn’t wearing it when I installed Tiger. I just didn’t think about how cool that would be. I think I’ll re-install Tiger now.

    -jcr

  22. I have a Tiger t-shirt, but I wasn’t wearing it when I installed Tiger. I just didn’t think about how cool that would be. I think I’ll re-install Tiger now.

    -jcr

  23. My God!! (No, not you CHTULHLU or what the hell your name is)

    I misspelled! I jammed meine Mutter instead of Butter!

    (Can I do a backup?)

  24. The aftershocks of Apple’s decision to remove all books published by John Wiley & Sons from Apple Store shelves in retaliation for iCon Steve Jobs are still reverberating throughout the Macintosh community.

  25. Ursdaythay, Aprilway 28, 2005

    Insideway Appleway.

    Ethay aftershocksway ofway Apple’sway ecisionday otay emoveray

    allway ooksbay ublishedpay ybay Ohnjay Ileyway & Onssay omfray

    Appleway Orestay elvesshay inway etaliationray orfay iConway

    Evestay Obsjay areway illstay everberatingray oughoutthray ethay

    Acintoshmay ommunitycay.

    Ofway oremay oncerncay, oweverhay, anthay Apple’sway ecisionday

    aymay ebay owhay ethay ompanycay arrivedway atway atthay

    ecisionday. Accordingway otay ourcessay, Appleway ashay

    etainedray ethay ervicessay ofway ethay atelay Ayatollahway

    Uhollahray Omeinikhay, ethay Iranianway ericclay owhay utpay

    away icepray onway Almansay Ushdie’sray eadhay orfay

    ublishingpay ethay Atanicsay Ersesvay. Itway asway atway

    Omeini’skhay uggestionsay atthay Appleway urgedpay allway ofway

    Iley’sway ooksbay omfray itsway oresstay.

    Ethay onversationcay inway isthay issueway ofway Insideway

    Appleway – unneledfay otay Azycray Appleway Umorsray Itesay ybay

    anway Appleway employeeway osingpay asway owlbay ofway uitfray

    – away ovidespray ucialcray ackgroundbay intoway Apple’sway

    oughtthay ocesspray.

    Andway ownay et’slay ogay… Insideway Appleway.

    [EOCAY Evestay Obsjay, Eniorsay Icevay Esidentpray ofway

    Etailray Onray Ohnsonjay, Eniorsay Icevay Esidentpray ofway

    Alessay andway Operationsway Imtay Ookcay, Eneralgay Ounselcay

    Ancynay Einenhay andway Ayatollahway Uhollahray Omeinikhay

    areway eatedsay aroundway away onferencecay oomray abletay.]

    OBSJAY: Anksthay orfay omingcay everyoneway. Iway antway otay

    introduceway Ayatollahway Uhollahray Omeinikhay. E’shay oinggay

    otay ebay elpinghay usway ithway isthay… issueway… eway

    avehay ithway Ohnjay Ileyway & Onssay. E’shay otgay away otlay

    ofway oodgay ideasway, Iway inkthay. Iway inkthay ehay ancay

    elphay usway. Ayatollahway?

    OMEINIKHAY: ANBAY ALLWAY OOKSBAY YBAY ETHAY INFIDELSWAY OWHAY

    UBLISHPAY ISTHAY ILTHFAY!

    OBSJAY: Hmmay.

    OHNSONJAY: Hmmay.

    OOKCAY: Hmmay.

    EINENHAY: Hmmay.

    OMEINIKHAY: EYTHAY AREWAY ASWAY OTHINGNAY OTAY OUYAY! ASTCAY

    EMTHAY OUTWAY! EIRTHAY ILEVAY IESLAY ALLSHAY OTRAY INWAY ETHAY

    UNSAY ANDWAY EBAY ICKEDPAY ATWAY YBAY ETHAY ULTURESVAY!

    OBSJAY: Iway eesay. Osay… ifway I’mway earinghay ouyay…

    anbay allway Ileyway ooksbay omfray ethay Appleway Oresstay.

    [Omeinikhay odsnay.]

    OBSJAY: Onray?

    OHNSONJAY: Iway unnoday, Evestay…

    EINENHAY: Ileyway ashay eenbay eryvay onfrontationalcay inway

    ourway egotiationsnay. E’veway ivengay emthay ampleway

    opportunityway otay orkway isthay outway ybay…

    OMEINIKHAY: ATWHAY ISWAY ISTHAY OMANWAY OINGDAY EREHAY?!

    OBSJAY: Uhollahray! Ememberray atwhay eway alkedtay aboutway?

    Orrysay, Ancynay. [Isperswhay otay Einenhay] Isthay isway ywhay

    e’shay illstay away onsultantcay. Indkay ofway away ortshay

    usefay. “Otentialpay exualsay arassmenthay uitsay” ittenwray

    allway overway imhay.

    EINENHAY: Uhway… eahyay. Ellway, Iway ustjay inkthay eway

    ouldcay akemay emthay eelfay ethay ainpay away ittlelay, ouyay

    owknay? Oldhay eirthay eetfay otay ethay irefay.

    OMEINIKHAY: AHWAY! ESYAY! EXCELLENTWAY! ORCHSCAY EIRTHAY EETFAY!

    EINENHAY: Ietquay, ouyay.

    OHNSONJAY: Uhhhway… OKWAY, ellway, I’llway avehay otay unray

    omesay umbersnay onway owhay atthay illway affectway alessay.

    Utbay isn’tway erethay away erceptionpay oblempray erehay?

    Aren’tway eway overreactingway?

    OBSJAY: Onay.

    EINENHAY: Onay.

    OOKCAY: Onay.

    OMEINIKHAY: ONAY.

    OHNSONJAY: Ahway. Ustmay ustjay ebay emay, enthay.

    OBSJAY: Ohway, ahay-ahay! [Apsslay Ohnsonjay onway ethay ackbay

    ] Ou’reyay otnay overreactingway ootay uchmay, Onray! Ownay,

    Ayatollahway, atwhay otherway ideasway avehay ouyay otgay orfay

    usway?

    OMEINIKHAY: Away OUNTYBAY ONWAY ETHAY EADHAY OFWAY ETHAY

    INFIDELWAY AUTHORWAY! INSPIREWAY OURYAY OLLOWERSFAY OTAY UNTHAY

    IMHAY OWNDAY IKELAY Away OGDAY! ENDWAY ISHAY ORALMAY UFFERINGSAY

    ! ISHAY EATHDAY ILLWAY EBAY Away ESSINGBLAY OTAY IMHAY!

    OOKCAY: Hmmay.

    EINENHAY: Hmmay.

    OHNSONJAY: Uhhhway…

    [Allway eethray ooklay otay Obsjay.]

    OBSJAY: [ausespay] Iway ikelay itway!

    OHNSONJAY: Ooohway, onay. Evestay… onay, onay, onay.

    EINENHAY: Mmmay, I’veway otgay otay ogay ithway Onray onway

    isthay oneway asway Iway inkthay atthay ightmay ebay againstway

    ethay awlay. Iway ouldcay eckchay utbay… eahyay, I’mway

    ettypray uresay at’sthay againstway ethay awlay.

    OBSJAY: Atwhay?! Onay! Atwhay?! Eallyray? Iway eanmay… it’sway

    ustjay away ountybay! It’sway otnay ikelay e’dway illkay imhay

    ourselvesway!

    OOKCAY: Ywhay on’tday eway ustjay oday ethay ookbay anningbay

    andway eesay owhay atthay oesgay?

    OBSJAY: Mmmay. OKWAY. E’llway abletay ethay ountybay orfay ownay

    . Ellway, ankthay ouyay, Ayatollahway. Ou’veyay eenbay eallyray

    elpfulhay.

    [Omeinikhay exitsway.]

    OHNSONJAY: Ewphay, Evestay, I’veway ottagay aysay, I’mway eryvay

    uncomfortableway ithway akingtay ethay adviceway ofway anway

    Iranianway ericclay onway owhay otay unray isthay ompanycay.

    OBSJAY: Pffay. Ohway, on’tday ebay uchsay away issysay.

    Onathanjay Iveway isway anway Iranianway ericclay.

    OOKCAY: NAY-onay e’shay otnay.

    OBSJAY: Ohway. Ellway, o’swhay ethay otherway Iranianway

    ericclay? Atthay otherway uygay…

    OOKCAY: Otherway…?

    OHNSONJAY: Usplay, idn’tday Ayatollahway Uhollahray Omeinikhay

    ieday inway 1989?

    OBSJAY: Eahyay! Ehay ookslay eallyray oodgay, oesn’tday ehay?

    EINENHAY: Hmmay.

    OOKCAY: Iway inkthay e’shay ostlay omesay eightway.

    OHNSONJAY: Ightray. Ellway, isthay ashay eenbay unfay, utbay

    I’veway otgay away… ingthay.

    [Ohnsonjay eaveslay, akingshay ishay eadhay.]

    OBSJAY: Uhhay. Ouyay owknay, Iway inkthay Omeinikhay alkedway

    offway ithway ymay enpay…

    OOKCAY: Iway avehay anway extraway enpay.

    [Ookcay oducespray omethingsay omfray ishay irtshay ocketpay

    andway utspay itway onway ethay abletay inway ontfray ofway

    Obsjay.]

    EINENHAY: Isway atthay away Acespay Oodfay Ickstay?

    OOKCAY: Ohway. Iway asway onderingway erewhay atthay entway.

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    on’tday avehay anway extraway enpay, enthay.

    Ostedpay ybay ARSCAY Affstay atway 10:05 PMAY | Inklay |

    Ommentscay (32)

  26. Let’s see,

    Wiley & Sons publishes A (ONE) book that is mildly critical of Steve Jobs. Apple bans the Wiley books from its stores. Wiley immediately doubles print runs and can not keep up with orders.

    CARS publishes dozens (maybe hundreds) of stories making fun of Steve Jobs. Apple ignores CARS. CARS fails to cash in on Apple’s wrath.

    John, you might have the basis of a discrimination suit here. Apple is obviously denying you the fame, notoriety, and success you deserve. Not that you’re not successful… didn’t mean to say THAT!

  27. I’m bored already. When’s Mac OS 10.5 “Abyssinian” coming out?

  28. Ursdaythay, Aprilway 28, 2005

    Insideway Appleway.

    BRILLIANT!!!

    Where’s my Guiness????

  29. Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Liverpool Unlucky Chelsea!!!!

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