Jobs Announces Firefox 2.0

After its early release yesterday, Apple CEO Steve Jobs held a hasty press conference this morning to announce Firefox 2.0.

Which struck the technology world as unusual as Apple does not make Firefox.

“Firefox 2.0 is the best browser for the Mac, Jobs said. “And here’s why.

“It’s standards-driven, stable and faster than lightning. It’s my new browser of choice for OS X.”

Drawing nothing but blank, confused stares from the gathered members of the media, Jobs added “I went straight from Internet Explorer to Firefox.”

Jobs then denied ever having heard the word “Safari” before, including in its African context.

Listening to a webcast of Jobs’ presentation, lead Firefox developer Ben Goodger asked “What the hell is he talking about?”

Realization suddenly coming over Goodger’s face, he cried “Hey… hey… HEY! He… he’s stealing our project!”

Indeed, according to sources in the know, much as he did with the Macintosh over twenty years ago, Jobs is now attempting to steal Firefox.

“First there was Lisa and the Mac, now it’s Safari and Firefox,” said Andy Hertzfeld. “Well, you’ve got to give Steve credit. He knows a quality product.”

Hertzfeld then complained that Jobs stole his lunch once in June of 1983.

“It was a cheese sandwich on wheat with lettuce and sprouts,” Hertzfeld said angrily.

“I… I still think of that sandwich sometimes…”