Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.

You know, I’d feel bad about us not getting a post together tonight, but I know for a fact that you just come here for the comments anyway, so it’s no big deal.

Anyway, you’ve got the whole weekend ahead of you and a wad of cash in your sweaty little fist (which is all covered in Cheeto dust), so maybe you could dump a little of it on one of our fine advertisers.

There’s Rogue Amoeba. They make good stuff. Although Kafasis tried to kill me that one time.

Well, there’s also Delicious Monster. The things they can do with an iSight camera. Tell you what. Although Shipley did call me a… well, let’s just say he said I like to do something to dogs that I don’t. Totally. I mean… really. I don’t even know how that would work.

Anyway, that brings us to our new advertisers: Shiny White Box and Many Tricks. They also make boss software and so far neither of their CEOs has tried to kill me or accused me of being into bestiality.

Of course, we’ve only just met so…

I should probably give them some time.

…

Do you think Gruber has this kind of relationship with his advertisers?

2,949 thoughts on “Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.”

  2. Damn it Ace, just because I might have a duty to kill you, does not mean that life’s little niceties should be ignored. If burial in the Tunnels is not satisfactory, then some other arrangement would be perfectly acceptable, if it proves necessary.

  5. Not if you’r not wearing any pants…..

    And I’m sure huh?s pantsâ„¢ would not like the sentiment. 

  6. The wolf

    Is shaved

    So neat and trim

    Red Riding Hood

    Is chasing him

    Burma-Shave

    ===========

    I know

    He’s a wolf

    Said Riding Hood

    But Grandma dear,

    He smells so good

    Burma-Shave

  10. Del, if you “is” on vacation and away from your work ethernet, how are you posting your comments? Bat-mail?

  11. By the way, the Department of Homeland Security has confiscated my pile of pumpkins. Anyone hoarding pumpkins is suspect, as apparently a new breed of terrorists has adopted the pumpkin bomb as their primary method of wreaking havok. One of the agents (I’ll call him “Loose-Lips”) told me they take a pumpkin, remove a small plug, and scoop out the insides. Then they fill it half full of Pepsi and carefully float a small boat of Mentos in it. They finish up by replacing the plug and securing it by tying a cord made of sheer nylon pantyhose around it. The pumpkin bomb is then placed in a populated area where somebody might disturb it.

    So far none of these bombs has been successfuly placed, but be on the lookout for pantyhosed pumpkins. Since I didn’t have any Pepsi or Mentos I’ve been let off with a warning, but they’re watching me.

  12. That’s good Ace, I no longer have to consider my Brompton vow.
    Were you strapped in a chair with a light shining in your eyes, while they worked you over with a sand filled sock?

  13. Del,
    I’ve looked at the map of America for hours but can’t find any island called Vacation.
    Are you sure it’s not Vancouver?

  14. Nxxx, I think you’re missing the obvious, VACATION must be some new designer drug, notice the syntax errors and the slurred typing on the exclamation. i

  15. *teee hee heee*

    I high on vacation!

    (Actually I was, I went to the top of the 3rd largest National Memorial in the usa today).

  16. Just be careful on vacation that you don’t go out on a three-hour boat tour with a guy who calls himself “The Professor.” You get used to the security of the tunnels, and then you find out the real world isn’t all prairie dogs and everclear. Be careful out there. Just sayin’. Pretty soon some old fat guy will be calling you “little buddy,” and you know where that kind of thing can lead.

  17. Rip,
    I’m intrigued. As we are behind you in social trends, where does the Little Buddy scenario lead?

  19. No prob on that point. I’ve been hanging out with a couple of girls. One is kind of a nerd and the other is a movie star. We were thinking if we got bored tomorrow we might take a boat out into the bay.

  24. My bottled water has passed its expiration date. Would it be unethical to give it to charity?

  25. Providing you remove it from the bottle first.
    The poor use bottles as weapons.
    I will dispose of the bottle for you.

    Ace?

    Water?

    You had me going there Ace.

  28. In 1749, the first official performance Handel’s Music for the Royal Fireworks finished early due the out break of fire.

    I claim an ironic number. Not to be confused with an iconic number, or a big fat party joint.

  36. Del, NORAD is tracking them, if they try to land anywhere in North America (Mexico doesn’t count) they will be shot down with extreme predudice. 

  38. Del,
    I e-mailed you the co-ordinates for 10, Downing Street and you’re a few seconds out and a bit of a shortfall. Hope they can get Notting Hill cleared up in time for next year’s Carnival.
    p.s. Can I have my money back, please?

  39. Okay, Mary S. Young State Park has been plastered with pumpkin. There won’t be soccer practice for weeks.

  42. Nxxx,

    Sorry about the mixup in order to fix the problem I launched 3 ton of pumpkins to that location. At least one should land where it is supposed to.

  45. Del,
    Thanks for the follow up but as our Prime Minister resembles a pumpkin, we are not sure who is speaking in Parliament now.
    Trust that it was three metric tonnes you despatched or it has breached European Union weight and measures legislation.

  50. Ace, I thought the Rule of Thumb was about gauging how thick of a stick could be used to beat your wife, and still be legal, I guess its been expanded lately.‰

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