Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.

You know, I’d feel bad about us not getting a post together tonight, but I know for a fact that you just come here for the comments anyway, so it’s no big deal.

Anyway, you’ve got the whole weekend ahead of you and a wad of cash in your sweaty little fist (which is all covered in Cheeto dust), so maybe you could dump a little of it on one of our fine advertisers.

There’s Rogue Amoeba. They make good stuff. Although Kafasis tried to kill me that one time.

Well, there’s also Delicious Monster. The things they can do with an iSight camera. Tell you what. Although Shipley did call me a… well, let’s just say he said I like to do something to dogs that I don’t. Totally. I mean… really. I don’t even know how that would work.

Anyway, that brings us to our new advertisers: Shiny White Box and Many Tricks. They also make boss software and so far neither of their CEOs has tried to kill me or accused me of being into bestiality.

Of course, we’ve only just met so…

I should probably give them some time.

…

Do you think Gruber has this kind of relationship with his advertisers?

2,949 thoughts on “Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.”

  3. Was Thoreau the only person to say “It.”?
    And if so, what made it “best”?
    Sorry to be a nuisance but I might learn something, very unlikely that I’ll retain it but……………………

  4. Just two comments from a strange Brit radio programme, both regarding Senator Caine.

    Regarding his age. I’m not sure America should vote for someone who’s election motto is “Now what did I come in here for?”

    and

    They say he is not Republican enough. Do they mean he doesn’t shoot his friends on hunting trips?

    Our lot are worse. We were promised a referendum regarding the European Community. We never had one so some mug sued the government for Breach of Contract. The Government’s Queen’s Counsel argued, successfully, that an Election Manifesto has no status in law. Summed up, the buggers can lie to you before, during and after the election.

  5. “How can you tell a politician is lying? Their lips move.” — Max Headroom

    All too true no matter where you are.

  6. Shoot. No wonder I can’t get a decent cup of everclear at my place.

    Everybody is still hanging around the tunnels over here. Well, at least the floors are reasonably clean. Ooops.

  7. 56k is just far too slow. I think they should get rid of it altogether and move on to 57k. That would make like much more bearable. I know I’d stop complaining about the internet out here if it were a full 57k rather than a pathetic 56.

    MARK

  8. Yeah, and dial-up is just impossible on my phone, ’cause it only has buttons. I’ve had to resort to using cable, and cable is so slow it takes hours to download a 50-pound Chinook salmon. And don’t even think about downloading a kayak!

  9. 57k? Oh, that’s just pathetic. Heck, my first computer had 64k, and the rank of Commodore isn’t even recognized by the Navy anymore.

    Fortunately, I still have a dial-up with a dial. Just think if there had never been dial phones. What would we have called a dial tone if we had started out with buttons? Peck tone? Punch tone? I think about crap like that. It’s no wonder my therapist buys me Christmas cards.

  10. My best phone was a special put out during the Queen’s Jubilee, aka Brenda’s party. At the time, only British Post Office Phones were allowed to be connected to the lines and this was official Managed to persuade acquaintances that it played the national anthem rather than ringing, so one had to stand rigidly to attention until it stopped.
    Good night.

  15. Barack has picked up quite a bit of momentum, and has garnered a lot of coverage in the news media, kind of an Obamarama.

  16. As for omitting Mc, I come from the small islands where the ‘son of’ Mc, Mac, M’, O’ and ap all are normal, so we ignore them.
    Apart from pronouncing Menzies as Mingies, Chomondeleigh as Chumley, Bottomley as Bumley, Trottesley as Trosley and Cirencester as Cisister, we don’t bother with the Mc/O’/ap bits. Not sure if you are aware of the terrible song “Donald, where’s yer troosers?” but the Donald in it is McDonald in your parlance besides that I prefer Caine.

  18. Well, Nxxx, thanks for the guide to pronunciation in your neck of the woods. (Or should I say, on your side of the pond?) Our only oddity here is overly round “o”, and an occasional “eh” from our visitors from the north.

  20. Hi Psyko. where were you this time?

    Nxxx, you forgot Worcestershire–I like to annoy sticklers by pronouncing every syllable.

  21. The Gloucester Aircraft Company changed its name to Gloster just to annoy you Ace.

    Now part of BAE or whatever they’re calling it now.

  22. I went to where the internet fails and snow falls (my parent’s place in the middle of nowhere). My MacBook was left bored and wanting, but at least my Subaru got to stretch its legs a bit and eat tons fresh snow.

    MARK

  25. No guns on any of my Subarus yet…

    And, sadly, I am not as quick as Petter. I have not had the opportunity to practice driving in that manner. I don’t even have an Impreza. 🙁

    MARK

  26. I have some spare ones if you want to borrow. I couldn’t get as many as I thought on my Snowmobile of DOOOM!

  28. My vehicle has a carbon-monoxide cannon mounted on the stern. It hasn’t hurt anyone yet, but I’m working on it.

  29. 200 elevenses, new page, new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,new page,………………………l

  30. Dang it, why didn’t you have to pack the cat up? I’m beginning to think there was never any need to and you guys just made me do it so you could laugh.

    MARK

  33. We had no idea that cat didn’t like being forcibly stuffed into small confined spaces. Who’d’a’ thought?

    What always worked with my cats is just putting an empty paper bag on the floor. They could never resist– within a minute they’d be sneaking inside.

    Psyko, if you’d used that technique, you wouldn’t have needed multiple arm transplants.

  35. Excuse me. Can anyone tell me if this is the right way to Albequerque? I seem to have misplaced my compass. I’m also missing a protractor, a Pink Pearl eraser, a ruler, and a number 2 pencil. If you see them, please hold on to them. I’ll be back.

    Thank you.

  37. Yes, he was rather polite, wasn’t he? Too bad he’s lost and likely to die before he reaches his destination. Life just isn’t fair sometimes.

    MARK

  39. Normally I would help him, but when a schoolteacher misspells Albuquerque, it endangers our youth and the future of mankind. I can’t be a party to that.

  41. I want to drive the getaway car. I’ll keep the engine running so as to help with global warming, as well as provide absconsion readiness.

  42. Ace,
    You only need a get away vehicle if your ‘target’ might fight back or the police authorities try to intervene.
    Being a State Registered Coward, I have no plans for de-walleting Rip until he is exhausted and comatose. As the tunnels are self-policed and I cannot envisage Rip doing a NYPD impersonation, we shall walk away in a calm and gentlemanly manner.

  43. I must warn you that I, as a licensed dispenser of marginal information, am routinely described as exhausted and comatose by my peers, students, and superiors during the routine conduct of my employment. Furthermore, the entire value of my personal wealth is inadequate for breakfast at Waffle House (that includes the $3 Off coupon in my wallet, which may be expired). Unless of course you sell my Tito Puente albums.

  46. Nah, I’ll still pick up the tab. Somebody else will have to find it. I’m not going to pick up the cat, though. That lacks originality. Been done.

  47. Damn!
    I was so looking forward to owning one third of an expired three dollar Waffle House discount voucher. Of such things, are dreams made of and Alien Worlds conquered.

  49. Del’s here. Now you’ll own a fourth of a potentially expired $3 Waffle House coupon. Hey, that’s $0.75 each. We could prolly get coffee for that.

  50. Naw, you guys go ahead–I’m opting out of the whole “mug Rip” game. Rip, you can have my share. If you cooperate, it might be worth the effort. Just don’t beat yourself up about it.

    Crime is too much work; I’d rather be a bureaucrat, maybe a Senior Tunnel Manager.

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