Apple Cutting Back On "Extras".

As expected, Apple announced updated iPod minis yesterday, in new colors and at a lower price. What was not expected, however, was what was removed.

The company no longer ships a Firewire cable or dock by default with any iPod. This is merely one in a series of reductions of included accessories. Readers may be surprised to learn that Apple no longer includes the following items with certain products.

  • The Mac mini does not ship with a monitor, mouse or keyboard. What’s up with that?
  • The iPod shuffle does not have a screen, but an optional LCD that shows the time and works as an alarm clock can be purchased separately from Amazon. Well, actually, it’s just an alarm clock. But at least you can say your iPod shuffle has a screen.
  • The Power Mac G5 no longer includes a pamphlet entitled So, You Bought A Power Mac G5. Big Whoop. Don’t You Think It’s Time Got Over Yourself, Mr. Big-Shot Power Mac G5 Owner?
  • A funny monkey that smokes cigarettes and wears a funny little hat is now listed as “Must be installed by Apple certified technician” for the eMac. Which is crazy because everyone wants the the funny monkey and they’re really not that hard to install.
  • iPod socks, strangely, no longer come with iPod socks. It’s just an empty box that you can add individual iPod socks to. Which the company suggests getting out of your sock drawer.
  • The little adapter that’s for using an older monitor with current Macs no longer includes an adapter that’s for using an older Mac with current monitors. Instead it comes with three pounds of bacon grease and a bib that says “Kiss me – I’m eating bacon grease!”
  • PowerBooks no longer come with a small cup of peaches in syrup and iBooks no longer have that new iBook smell.

A group of concerned Mac users is considering starting a class action lawsuit against the company under the premise that it should include everything with each of its products “because that would be the right thing to do.”

50 thoughts on “Apple Cutting Back On "Extras".”

  1. This is a post as well, although not as well thought out as the previous posts in this particular set of comments.

    I want the monkey.

  2. Oh wow. Umm… didn’t one of them violate a rule by referring to the article before the eleventh post? I hope something bad happens to you. Mean and evil it will be… mean and evil……

  3. Hey… rules are rules.. I don’t make them, I just live by them. Its really nothing personal. Except that I was hoping for a post much earlier than I got one.. but thats not your fault. Nothing personaly. I just hate you. Thats all.

  4. That comment from Masako has got me all hot and sweaty. I need a cold shower…and someone to sponge me.

  5. Holy Friggin Crap! A real Masako sighting!

    tis a blessing, it is!

    and you can tell it’s really her, cause she knows how to spell her last name, and all the posers always get it wrong, or not at all. I admit that I didn’t even know she HAD a last name until 2004. ah, it’s so much fun getting the band back together…

  6. Let’s face it do we really care what’s in the box? Isn’t it the experience of being in an Apple store with all the white that makes us salivate like rabid shar pei?

    And so long as we’ve got the little sticker with the bite out of it to go on the bumper of the trabant or goggomobile what else matters?

  7. Sorry I’m a bit late; I was off TiVoing tomorrow’s post so I could watch myself being hil-bleedin’-larious in it.

    So tune in then if you want a piece of that.

    I particularly like the way I subvert the sexbot’s-as-North-Korean-Red-Guard’s-pet-ninja-monkies metaphor in the fourth Help Desk question.


    So, er . . . what’s happening in the here and now? You know, other than Moltz pretending to be K.S., Hot Crackers!, *and* Masako just to boost CARS hits.

  8. hah, yes thats the other posibility … though spelling Masako’s sirname right is still highly suspicious.

  9. I tried the “Kiss me – I’m eating bacon grease!” bib once. It didn’t work real well – except for insects. Just to warn you if you were thinking of getting one.

  10. Having been a flea, I can honestly tell you that bacon fat is extreamly attractive to fleas especially when its on a primate.

  11. oops, didn’t realise these comments noticed html …

    I added a coment at the bottom of the last post indecating that that post was a reference to the MEGA POST

    I can’t remember precicely what I said though I’m ceratin it was extreamly funny.

  12. This tendency to leave out what most people regard as essential is an Apple tradition.

    The XServe comes without a video card. (Makes initial setup a bear.)

    The Original iMac was the first desktop computer in over a decade to come without a floppy drive.

    The whole Performa line left out any sense of style or elegance.

    (Ok this last one is bull. Most PCs have no sense of style or elegance. The Performas were no worse than 90% of PCs. )

  13. Back in 1985, when I bought my first Mac, a Mac Plus, it came bundled with two floppy disks, a “Tour of Macintosh” cassette tape, a cuddly puppy and Sexbot 1.0. Sexbot 1.0 required paper clip 2.0 and rubberband 1.2 to operate, but niether of those had been released yet. Then Microsoft stole the whole paper clip thing, so I never actually got the Sexbot to boot up. But, at least it was bundled with the Mac. Nowadays, all you get is some really nicely formed styrofoam packing pieces, not as much fun, really…

  14. I also find it disturbing that the iMac’s no longer come with ponies. I loved it when we ordered the iMac G4s and got one of those adorable little guys. Especially since work would let me take them home.

    Also I don’t like it that now when you order your own Phil Schiller that it no longer comes with the hockey uniform, hockey stick and puck, and high alcohol content beer.

  15. The more I think about it the more disgruntled I get with those cheapskates at Apple. They are so cheap they no longer put colors on the nifty apple stickers that come with their computers. Also now they only give stickers and not the nifty cling-on (not klingon) plastic logos you could move around.

  16. And how about the programmer’s switch? I loved that thing—a simple piece of plastic and voilá…you’re a programmer! Forget TiVo, Apple should by Cracker Jack. It’s those little “extras” that ensure loyalty.

    Remenber, the difference between the ordinary and the extraordinary is “extra.”

  17. Now might be a good time for CARS to stock bibs in the online store. They could sport clever witticisms and bits of dried food.

    Just another revenue source is all I’m saying…

  18. I heard Pages doesn’t come with Spell Check anymore. Just a bottle of White-Out.

    And not a new bottle, either. An old one with the brush all encrusted with dried White-Out.

    Don’t blame me. I’m just sitting over here with Masako Yamamoto. More sake?

  19. OMG! Has anyone seen Psyko or Huck?!? They must be out sick…seems so strange without seeing their monikers in the posts. Almost like a Mini without the monitor and keyboard…sniff….

  20. Well, that’s all fine and dandy. Becuase I ordered my G5 10 seconds after Steve Jobs announced them. Yessiree. Back in the day we got ponies AND funny monkeys! Yep, Them little guys are scurrying around my h/o floor right now like a bunch of, um, scurrying little monkeys and ponies would scurry around on an h/o floor.

    Nobody wants to hear a bunch of whiners. So just shut up and let me know when this workday ends. So I can go play with my monkey and pony.

    The monkey’s been bad, you know, so I’m gonna have to spank him…

  21. “So, er . . . what’s happening in the here and now? You know, other than Moltz pretending to be K.S., Hot Crackers!, *and* Masako just to boost CARS hits.”

    Well if I’m Moltz I better get mentioned in a post sometime soon

  22. Is that what they make gummy bears out of? ‘Cause those things are tasty.

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