Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.

You know, I’d feel bad about us not getting a post together tonight, but I know for a fact that you just come here for the comments anyway, so it’s no big deal.

Anyway, you’ve got the whole weekend ahead of you and a wad of cash in your sweaty little fist (which is all covered in Cheeto dust), so maybe you could dump a little of it on one of our fine advertisers.

There’s Rogue Amoeba. They make good stuff. Although Kafasis tried to kill me that one time.

Well, there’s also Delicious Monster. The things they can do with an iSight camera. Tell you what. Although Shipley did call me a… well, let’s just say he said I like to do something to dogs that I don’t. Totally. I mean… really. I don’t even know how that would work.

Anyway, that brings us to our new advertisers: Shiny White Box and Many Tricks. They also make boss software and so far neither of their CEOs has tried to kill me or accused me of being into bestiality.

Of course, we’ve only just met so…

I should probably give them some time.

…

Do you think Gruber has this kind of relationship with his advertisers?

2,949 thoughts on “Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.”

  2. Has anyone noticed that the counter at the top of the page (1121 Responses to “Nothing. Nadda. Zip. Zilch.”) is off by one? That helps explain my counting irregularities.

    Or am I the only one afflicted with this malady?

  4. 1234 Nxxx says
    June 6th, 2007 at 7:35 am
    East Grinstead Tunnel runs under the Mormon Temple, so I simply asked could I check my relatives records and they dug me out.
    I’d also like to point out that Steve McQueen could not save himself.
    To save further problems, 1234 has already been claimed and any others are forgeries.

  6. Thanks for the Tapioca on my head. About time someone put out my flaming afro-puffs.

    I kept getting thrown out of restaurants because I was smoking.

  8. Aren’t wax beans those things in still life paintings painted by all the Old Masters?

    Please do not post any derogatory remarks about other habitués of the Tera-Post.

  9. So it looks like Apple wants to settle the Beer iPhone/ Hallmark hmPod case quietly. I think they are more embarrassed about ever making the hmPod as opposed to that they actually have to worry about the threat our lawsuit poses.

    Here’s the question. The settlement looks like it is going to give us 30 brand new Sexbots every year (of the newest and greatest model), iPhones all around, and access to their research labs and factories so that we can develop a new line of iFlames. I think it sounds pretty good, but I’m not certain if I should hold out for more. What do you think?

  10. I notice that Psyko made an appearance in the Fake Phil comments yeaterday, so he hasn’t been kidnapped again, apparently. Maybe he has matured, and outgrown the Tera-Post…

    Nah.

  11. Matured?
    Bloody Hell.
    I’ve only just learnt how to post here and I’m seventy.
    Guess I’ll be here for a few years yet.

  12. Del, lets hold out for some of those back dated stock options we heard so much about earlier this year, they sound really interesting and brought a lot of attention to Steve and to Apple in general.

  13. Dear Steve,

    I have decided that I can withstand the media scrutiny and general humiliation of being granted a few hundred million in back-dated stock options.

    I’m right here for you if you need me.

    Sincerely,

    Rip

    P.S. Can I just *peek* at a sexbot?

  14. Del, please add a demand that the sexbots have multitouch input and output. And they need to remove the dongles–they’re unsightly.

  16. Well a massive cargo train from Apple just showed up and they are unloading a few hundred million cattle with 12-01-2006 branded on their back.

    Why did we want so many of these?

  20. Just what we need. It isn’t as if the elephants weren’t drinking up all the everclear fast enough. Now we have to share with cattle.

    We’re going to need another Ames-Keokuk-Des Moines roundabout in the midwest tunnel system.

  21. Can do a good deal on our Spaghetti Junction.
    Two results.
    1) You get control of Tunnel traffic
    2) I get to run a book on how long it takes for the average UK motorist to realise it is missing.

  23. Forget about Spaghetti Junction. Started the Senior IOM TT and went down a hole which means the Tunnels have another non-mapped entrance. Whilst slowing from just over 200 mph, though I spotted Paris Hilton.
    Who let her in?

  24. Are you sure it was her? Apparently the L.A. tunnel is getting a little lax. Or maybe just getting a little. Who can be sure?

    Maybe we can start a rich, skinny, spoiled, snotty, airhead bimbo tunnel. I’m thinking northern Alberta (or possibly Ontario – I can’t spell Saskatchewan).

  25. Rip,
    Aren’t you a little hard on the poor, misunderstood creature. Surely it is a result of her over privileged upbringing?

    No. You’re right. Hang ’em all.

  26. They aren’t misunderstood. That’s their worst problem. They’re clearly understood.

    Hmmmm. There’s a spot we haven’t used. Fifty miles east of Sitka. Ãœberslut Tunnel of Like.

  28. Hey guys I was coming up through the LA tunnel and I found a globby mess of mashed silicone with some blond hairs. Any idea what the cattle may have run over?

  29. I know this sounds weird, but couldn’t we start a dairy? It’s cheesy but lucrative.

    I’d handle the shoveling, but I just had my nails done. Happy to supervise though.

  35. European Ignorance.
    We normally train our cattle so that we don;t have to steer them, they do it themselves.
    Is that why Longhorns are so popular over there?
    Hear you’re also renamed them Vistas.

  37. Isn’t this Safari 3 Beta brilliant?
    Kj59qy4 476 lwi.’T.
    fRqut mquidsy o’nunc.

  38. I’m thinking about switching my pc over to safari instead of Firefox. I love how safari handles rss feeds and notifying you of a rss feed update.

  39. I belive you got the steer thing wrong guys, from what I understand a steer was once a bull that had his hangy downies removed shortly before bovine puberty. It’s supposed to make the meat more tender,… which seems perfectly logical to me.

  43. You must have heard of the hiker who, whilst passing through a farmyard, asked the farmhand milking a cow what the time was.
    The farmhand raised the udder and appeared to weigh it before announcing “Be twenty afore eight, m’dear.”.
    The incredulous hiker asked “How do you tell the time by a cow’s udder?”
    ‘I don’t m’dear, it’s just if I lift the udder, I can see the church clock.”.

    I don’t wish to know that. Kindly leave the stage.

  45. Is today talk gibberish day and I missed the announcement? Is everyone so filled with grief at the Entity’s departure that they don’t know how to type? Or was the Entity the only thing keeping Spam from the TP?

    Stay tuned while we answer these questions and many more.

  46. We are all too excited by Safari 3 Beta to make sense.
    Thank you Saint Steve.
    And it’s free.
    So we can forgive it the occasional *!@€ nghlurk.

  47. I’m afraid things are in for great deal of change. Without the Entity to crack the whip, Ol’ Johhny boy will let things go. I wonder if Tera-Post maintenance is on the budget chopping block.8

  48. The Tera-Post might be better off without the maintenance. I suspect maintenance is what did in the Giga-Post and the Mega-Post before it. We don’t not need no lack of stinkin’ maintenance!

  49. So that’s what the awful stench is, stinking maintenance.
    Are you sure it’s not John, who is really upset by the cheque book loss, going off after topping himself?
    Who is brave enough to investigate.
    (This is a bit like a Famous Five story.)

  50. Hi, y’all. I just got back from the newly forming PetaPost (http://www.crazyapplerumors.com/?p=870), and am trying to dig a cross tunnel.

    I agree that we don’t need no…

    Maintenance be dwiddled; full steam ahead.

    Del, do we have any iPrairieDogs on mothballs? They might be useful in opening a cross tunnel (and clearing the old tunnels of steers in the process).

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